Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [14/14] *END*

Saturday, June 23th (Two Years later)~~

You opened your eyes, staring up at the ceiling.

Another sleepless night. Another nightmare. Another day of feeling useless.

It’s been two years since you came out as gay. You and Ally started dating and you started an early career as a Broadway ensemble member for Hamilton. After Lin left the show, he managed to get you a spot in the ensemble where you were excelling. You managed to get a scholarship to the performing arts school you always wanted to go to. Your life was coming together.

Then why did you feel so horrible?

You hadn’t had a depression episode in months. You’ve been so happy and content with life. You loved your girlfriend. Her parents liked you. Lin was so proud of you. You changed your last name to Miranda once the adoption when through and still had the Hamilton OBC as your family, although they were getting busier and busier. Everything was fine.

You pulled yourself out of bed. You looked around your room. Lin finally managed to clean out the spare room and furnished it into a bedroom that you had to share with Sebastian since Lin got full custody of him. You got one of those dorm loft beds with the ladder and built-in desk, a sixteenth birthday present from Chris and his family. You had a laptop, an iMac, a closet full of awesome clothes, just an overall great room.

You made your way down the ladder and shuffled into the kitchen. Lin was sitting at the kitchen counter on his laptop, murmuring to himself as he stared intently at the screen. He had cut his hair short soon after leaving Hamilton and was now doing big new projects outside of Broadway.

“Mornin’.” You said with a yawn, opening the fridge.

Lin murmured a greeting but didn’t move. You sighed. When he got really deep into his work, Lin barely talked. This was alright on other days. Today wasn’t the best day for that.

“Dad?” You glanced over your shoulder.

Lin perked up, looking at you. “Yes, mija?”

“Can we spend the day together?”

Lin frowned. “(Y/N), you know I’m very busy all week.”

“It’s just one day.” You argued, folding your arms. “We can get some lunch, walk around central park, just enjoy the day together.”

Lin sighed, looking back at the laptop. “We can do that on Saturday.”

You normally didn’t get angry at this answer, but you felt so upset all of a sudden.

“So your work is more important than me?” You asked out of nowhere.

Lin looked up, frowning. “What is that suppose to mean?”

You balled your fists. “I just asked to spend time with you, my father, since we haven’t done anything together for weeks and you just brushed me off like that because obviously, your projects are more important than your own children!”

Lin stood, glaring slightly at his daughter. “You just woke up. Go take your medication and then you’ll be thinking rationally.” He packed up his laptop and grabbed his keys. “I’m going to Kail’s. I’ll be home before dinner.”

“You’re leaving me here with Sebastian?” You asked with shock.

“His babysitter will be here in twenty minutes. Then you can go and spend the day with Ally.” And with that, he left, slamming the door behind him.

He’s deserted you. The little voice in your head spoke. You’re all alone. No one loves you. Not him. Not Ally. Not Sebastian. Noone.

You believed that voice. It’s been there since you developed depression. That little voice poked and teased you. Told you how horrible and useless you were. Never letting you have peace. The medicine dulled the voice but it always came back after the meds wore off. You felt damaged. Not normal. A broken doll.

You never should have survived that fever.

~~~

Lin wasn’t expecting a phone call so soon after he left home. It’s been at least thirty minutes since he left his apartment and dropping the bubbling argument with you. He knew how you got when you didn’t take your meds first in the morning. He was already stressing over a new thing for the Puerto Rico debt situation and didn’t need you annoying him. He’ll make it up to you later.

When he saw it was Sebastian’s babysitter, his heart sunk. Did something happen? Did you do something? Did something happen to Sebastian?

“Hello?” Lin answered.

“Something happened!” The babysitter cried, her voice crackling and full of horror. “(Y/N)! She just- I called 911. She overdosed or something! You need to come quick!”

Lin didn’t answer, just grabbed his keys and bolted for the door. He got into his car and almost crashed into the car coming from the other side of the road. He wasn’t thinking. He was running on fear. Did you really overdose? Did you try to kill yourself?

Was it because of him?

Lin didn’t realize he made it to the hospital until he almost crashed into an ambulance. He parked in a spot before racing to the hospital. He gave his name to the nurse at the front desk and explained the situation as much as he could. The nurse explained that you were brought in a few minutes before and were in critical condition. Lin was scared out of his mind. So you really did try to kill yourself.

Lin took a seat in the waiting area, his foot tapping impatiently and he could barely keep a firm grip on his phone since his hands were shaking so badly. He managed to text Kail, Lacamore, Phillipa, Renee, Chris, and Ally on what happened. Sometime later, the whole original main cast came to support Lin. It got so stuffy that the nurse at the front desk had them all move into an empty conference room. Ally was in the worst condition, either sobbing into her hands or just whimpering softly to herself. Renee and Phillipa would comfort her but nothing worked to soothe her.

Just then, a nurse entered, holding a clipboard and having a grim look on her face.

“How is (Y/N)?” Ally blurted, rushing to her feet. “Is she okay? Can we go see her?”

The nurse sighed sadly. “I’m so sorry. (Y/N) didn’t make it.”

The room was deadly silent. No one moved. No one said anything. It was just still as a corpse.

You were… dead?

How?

You were so happy… so content with life…

Why did you take your own life?

Ally let out a pained sob as she collapsed to her knees, wailing into her hands. Renee joined her, softly sobbing into her fist. Everyone else just stood there with tears rolling down their faces. The nurse excused herself and was about to leave when Lin spoke up.

“Can I see her?” He pleaded.

The nurse smiled softly. “Of course. Follow me.”

~~~

You looked so peaceful. Your hair was brushed back from your face and your face was pale, almost translucent. Your lips were parted slightly as if you were sleeping.

You looked like a sleeping princess.

“She’s only seventeen.” Lin murmured, gripping your limp cold hand tightly. “She was going to be a dancer. I was so proud of her. She finally was taking care of herself.”

Chris patted his friend on the shoulder. “I can’t imagine what you are going through right now, Lin. But we’re all here for you.”

“(Y/N) was a wonderful girl,” Phillipa spoke up, sniffling. “She always told the best jokes.”

“She was a shining star,” Renee spoke, wiping away tears. “She was a literal angel from the Lord. You did a good thing by taking her in.”

“You’re a good dad, Lin.” Daveed chimed in, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “You didn’t do anything to fuel this. If was your biological family, most likely.”

Lin knew they were right. Your family must have been the problem. Neglective mother, abusive father, suicidal sibling, just the worst traits and doomed from the start. He did his best to help you. But it seems the world detested you so much that they destroyed you.

“Thanks, guys.” Lin murmured. “I’d really like to be alone right now.”

“Can I stay?” Ally asked immediately. “Please, I’d like to say goodbye.”

Lin looked at her with sad eyes but nodded. Everyone else left, leaving Lin and Ally alone with you.

They didn’t speak for what felt like hours but were only a few seconds.

“I wanted to marry her, you know.” Ally spoke, breaking the silence. “I was gonna wait until we moved in together and were stable enough.” She pulled out something from her pocket. “I even got a promise ring.”

Lin looked down at the simple silver band in Ally’s palm. It was classy but sentimental no doubt. Lin took it lightly and slipped it on the ring finger of your left hand, which was the hand he was holding in his grip. Ally smiled, thankful. The two stood in more silence before Lin coughed.

“I’m sorry this happened.” He said, his voice shaky. “I didn’t mean to let her do this. Believe me.”

“I do.” Ally answered, looking up at him. “I trust you as much as she did. (Y/N) would talk to highly of you and always tried to keep you close to her heart. That’s why she wanted your approval on our relationship. You saved her from an early death, after all.”

Lin smiled, tears building up again. He felt…happy. His little girl may be gone but he was happy to know she didn’t hate him. Her death wasn’t in vain. It was inevitable but he was happy he could give her two last good years left on this planet.

Edelweiss,” Ally began to sing softly, taking your right hand in hers. “Edelweiss… Every morning you greet me…

Small and white,” Lin joined in. “Clean and bright… you look so happy to me, to me…

Blossom of snow may you bloom and grow,” They sang in unison. “Bloom and grow forever…

Just then, everyone else came into the room, joining in on the song.

Edelweiss,” All ten of them sang. “Edelweiss… Bless my homeland forever!

Lin thought he felt someone hug him from behind.

He heard what sounded like your laughter.

He smiled.

Dulces sueños, ángel mío.

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Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [13/14]

Monday, August 17 (Seven Months Later)~~

Hamilton has been on Broadway for about a week now.

You never saw the Richard Rodgers so hectic and busy as this before. You had stepped into the backstage like normal and was greeted with actors and stagehands bustling to and fro, getting stuff done. You would help out with fetching costumes or arranging props for the opening number. You’d even practice with the ensemble. You had the dance numbers for My Shot, Yorktown, The Schuyler Sisters, and Helpless memorized by heart. You showed Lin and the cast a few times and Lin promised to get you a place in the ensemble in the future. Yeah, he thought you were good enough for Broadway, even though you were sixteen.

Lin had told you to come to the theater as soon as you finished with your classes for the day. So, once you logged off for the day, you got into an Uber and went to the Richard Rodgers. You brought your homework with you just in case you needed something to do in between shows. You were used to sitting in Lin’s dressing room for hours while the show went on, usually bored as hell. Kail would sometimes come in and smuggle you some doughnuts and a soda, looking after you like a loving uncle, which is why you called him ‘Uncle Kail’. During the intermission, You’d hang out with Renée, Phillipa, and Jasmine in their dressing room while Renée and Phillipa touched up their makeup and changed dresses and while Jasmine transformed from Peggy to Maria. You’d help her with her hair and it would earn you a red kiss mark on your cheek. It kinda sucks since you’re a closet lesbian and haven’t come out yet. Oh well, take it one step at a time, (Y/N).

You had just finished your geometry homework when there was a knock on the door. You got up from the couch and opened it, revealing Daveed in his Jefferson costume.

“Hey, short stuff.” Daveed greeted you with one of the many brotherly nicknames he has for you. “Is Lin in here?”

You shook your head. “Sorry, D. But your Hamilton is in another castle.”

You both shared a laugh as Leslie, who was in his Act Two Burr costume, walked in. “Hey there, short stack.” He greeted you. “Do you know where Lin is? It’s almost time for Act Two.”

You shrugged. “Haven’t seen him since you guys took places for the opening number.”

Leslie huffed. “Well, how’ve you been? You’ve been cooped up in here all day.”

You shrugged. “Just doing homework. What else can I do?”

“Are you feeling better? Lin said you had a little episode a couple of days ago.”

You nodded. “I’m feeling much better. It was just a small panic attack. Nothing too bad. And Lin was there to help me through it.”

Both men smiled and murmured a ‘good’ in unison. A voice came over the intercom and announce five minutes before curtain. Daveed gave you a hug while Leslie squeezed your arm before they left to go find Lin. You kept the door open, since the room was getting stuffy and hot, and went back to the couch to finish your homework. You got halfway through your French vocabulary review when your mind started to wander.

You couldn’t stop thinking about how you were going to come out to Lin. What would he say? Is he homophobic? Was he going to throw you out? Was he going to accept you? Was he going to send you to conversion therapy or try to beat the homosexuality out of you? Your mind was racing with these horrible thoughts and you couldn’t stop them.

You felt trapped. Your chest started to hurt and the room grew insanely hot. Your heartbeat quickened and you began to shake. You started to hyperventilate. You couldn’t breathe. Your thoughts blurred and you couldn’t think straight. Your head started to spin. You started to cry. Your weeping turned into wailing. Your wailing turned into violent sobbing. You couldn’t help it. You couldn’t stop it. You felt like you were having a heart attack. You felt like you were going to die. All you could hear was your own voice, screaming profanities at you and saying how you were horrible, you were terrible, you deserved to die, you weren’t worth it, you’re not worth anything. You curled up in a tight ball, rocking back and forth slowly.

You didn’t see or hear Jasmine enter the dressing room. You didn’t hear her calling your name in concern. You didn’t feel her come up to the couch and sit down next to you. But, you did feel her touch your arm, which made you yelp and flinch. Jasmine retracted her hand away from you and she went into the concern-big-sister mode. She left and rushed for the stage manager, begging her to postpone the curtain call.

“Jasmine, you know I can’t do that.” The stage manager said with an irritated glare. “We need to start Act Two or people are going to leave.”

“It’s an emergency!” Jasmine cried. “Lin’s daughter is having a horrible panic attack and he needs to help her. He’s the only one who can help her!”

The manager tapped her nails on her clipboard before groaning. “I’ll tell Lacamore and Kail that Act Two will be postponed. You only get ten minutes, you understand. That’s as much time as I can give you.”

Jasmine thanked the manager before rushing down the hall to the other dressing rooms. The manager’s voice came on the intercom, announcing that Act Two was postponed for ten minutes and for Lin to go to his dressing room immediately.

Lin, who was in his position for Act Two, felt a wave of uneasiness come over him. Were you okay? You were in his dressing room. Something was wrong…

When Lin came into the dressing room and his eyes landed on your shaking sobbing form, his heart broke into pieces. He immediately raced to your side. He remembered your attack a couple of days ago and what your therapist said for him to do when you had panic attacks. It worked last time and it will sure as hell work now.

“(Y/N),” Lin said in a soft voice. “(Y/N), breathe. Take a deep breath, okay?”

You heard him and tried so hard to breathe but you couldn’t.

“Take a deep breath for four seconds okay? I’ll count to four and while I’m counting, try to take a breath, alright?”

You nodded. Lin counted and you took a breath as he did so. Then he counted backward from four as you breathed out. This went on for a minute or so. Your sobbing went back to weeping. Your chest pain lessened to just a dull throbbing.

“(Y/N), mi corazon, can you sit up, please? Let me see your face.”

You slowly unfolded yourself from your fetal position. You were still slightly shaking but not as violently as you were earlier. Lin slowly reached up and cupped your face with both of his hands, making you flinch but slowly relax. You kept your eyes on him as he talked to you.

“Do you remember when I took you to the paint shop when you first moved in?” Lin whispered.

You nodded, finding your voice. “we… We spent the whole day looking at colored pencils and wooden figurines…” Your voice was small and gravely.

Lin smiled. You always loved his smile.

“Yes, we did. Remember Pippa’s birthday? How you beat everyone at Wii Sports and Just Dance 3?”

You laughed weakly. “Pippa allowed me the biggest piece of cake. I ended up puking it into one of her houseplants, though…”

Lin kept bringing up fond memories; cast members’ birthdays, parties, shows, lazy days together, going to the park with Lin’s dog Tobi, even the time you went to a water park with Anthony and Jasmine and pushed Anthony into the tide pool. You still owed him twenty bucks because of that.

Lin also murmured softly to you about how your panic attack wasn’t for forever and there was nothing to be afraid of.

“Y-You’re wrong…” You whispered. “There is something to be afraid of…”

Lin frowned. “What is it, mi hijo?”

You went silent, tears falling down your face. Lin held you and had you focus on breathing again. Breathe in for four seconds and breathe out for four seconds. Talk about a funny memory. Practice some words in Spanish and French. Breathe. Keep breathing. You’re doing great. Everything is going to be okay. Nothing is going to hurt you. Just focus on me.

The panic went away. You finally relaxed, letting out a long sigh. Your heartbeat went back to normal and the last of your tears fell off your face. You didn’t pull away from Lin’s hug for a few more moments before sitting up and wiping the tear residue from your face. You sniffled too. The room was silent for a few moments before Lin stood up. He was about to walk out when you spoke up.

“Dad?”

Lin froze in his tracks. You never called him dad since he took you in. You swore you’d never call him that because it caused you too much pain. Did you finally let go of that pain and decided to call Lin ‘dad’ now?

Lin turned around, his eyes brimmed with tears.

“Y-Yes, mija?” Lin choked out.

You lowered your gaze to your lap. Did you really want to tell him? Weren’t you scared he’d reject you? Yeah, you were. But you can tell Lin loves you. It wouldn’t hurt to just say it. Like ripping off a bandage.

“I… I’m…” You took a deep breath. “I’m gay.”

The room was deadly silent. All sounds were gone. All you could hear was your heartbeat and your heavy breathing. You didn’t look up at Lin. You were waiting for him to scream or slap you or throw you to the ground. But, he didn’t. He stayed there in his place, not moving a muscle. You were sure he hated you now.

“You called me dad.”

You looked up at Lin with a confused face. He has tears rolling down his face. His hands were clenched into fists. He looked to be on the verge of crying. You stood and slowly made your way over to him.

“Did you not hear what I just said? I said ‘I’m-“

“I know, I know. You’re gay. But, you told me you’d never call me dad. And you called me dad. Does that mean you actually see me as a father figure?”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Lin, if I didn’t see you as a father figure then I wouldn’t have called you dad. Of course, I see you as a dad to me. I think you’re my only actual dad who gave a shit about me. Which is why I came out to you first.”

Lin blinked. “You didn’t tell anyone before now?”

You gave him a ‘really, bitch?’ look. “Did you actually think I’d go on a date with Scott if Ally knew I was gay? No, she wouldn’t. So no, you’re the first person to know.”

Lin let out a sound of surprise before sweeping you up in his arms, hugging you tightly as he spun around and around. You let out a squeak of surprise but it turned into happy giggling. After a few moments of spinning, Lin placed you back on your feet and hugged you tightly again, planting a kiss on your forehead. You felt tears fall from your eyes again. You sniffled and tried not to cry. You already cried enough. And you didn’t want to stain Lin’s costume. He had a show to do after all.

That’s when it hit you.

The show.

You pulled away. Lin looked at you with concern and confusion.

“You have a show to do.” You said, trying to push Lin out of the dressing room. “Go and finish the show. Then we can celebrate me being gay.”

Lin laughed. “We only have three more minutes. And I’m still a little shaken up about you calling me dad and then coming out as gay. Can we take a few steps back? I’m kind of a little overwhelmed.”

You nodded. You both sat down on the couch. You kept your hands in your lap while Lin sat back into the couch, taking a deep breath. After a few seconds, he spoke.

“When did you decide on calling me dad?”

You rubbed your hands. “About five months ago. That night you made me go to sleep instead of staying up with you. It made me realize something. If you didn’t care, you’d just leave me to tire myself out. But you actually care. You took me to bed and even tucked me in. Everything you do for me shows that you care about me more than just a troubled teen you helped off the streets. You help me, you support me, you treat me as a person and not a punching bag, you listen to me, you value my opinions, you care about my mental and physical health. You say you love me and you look after me like a dad would look after his child. And I can’t thank you enough for that.”

“You know I’d do anything for you, (Y/N).”

“Yes, I know. I just can’t feel like a nuisance. You didn’t have to take me in. You could have thrown me on the elevator that night and made me someone else’s problem. But you didn’t. You took me in a nursed me back to health. You treated me as your own child when we first met. You have my back. There’s nothing you won’t do if it helps and ensures my safety.”

“(Y/N)…”

“And I know I’m making a huge deal about little things but it means so much to me. Knowing that you care about me just… mind boggles me. No one cared about me like a parent would. Not my real dad. Not my real mom. Not even my friends cared about me this much. All I wanted to say is… Thank you.”

Lin smiled. He sat up and threw his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into a side hug. You rested your head on his shoulder and took a deep breath. He smelled like coffee and hair gel. You didn’t mind it. It was his scent. The scent you’ll always remember as your dad. Your real dad.

“Does this mean I have to look out for girls coming after you?” Lin asked.

You sat up and slugged him in the arm. “Shut up, dad.” You murmured.

“What was that? I didn’t hear you.” Lin said teasingly.

“I said ‘shut up, dad’.” You said louder.

“You said what? (Y/N), you need to speak louder.” Lin egged you on.

“I said, ‘shut up, dad’!” You yelled, laughing.

“Ah!” Lin fake-fainted. “Music to a father’s ears! I’ll have to get used to that.”

You rolled your eyes. You fake-shoved him off of the couch. “Go and do your show, old man. I’ll be here waiting and I expect you’ll tell everyone I’m gay, right?”

Lin chuckled and winked at you as he walked out of the room.

“You know me so well, mija.”

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [12/14]

Lin enrolled you into a K-12 online school immediately after the incident with the bullies. Thanks to Burmese and Grace recording the abuse, Michelle and her helpers were suspended and Lin insisted you charged them with assault when you didn’t think it was needed. After it was taken into the police’s hands, you tried to go back to your normal life.

Or, what you thought was normal.

Since you were young, you’ve been struggling with depression and self-loathing because of your upbringing. You’ve never been properly treated for your depression so when you had rock bottom episodes, they’d hit you hard. You’d cut, you’d starve, you wouldn’t even get out of bed. You just couldn’t bother with taking care of yourself. It wouldn’t go away for days but you had to deal with it since you didn’t want to face your father’s wrath. So, you’d force yourself out of bed and trudge on since you didn’t have anything keeping you in place.

Today was no different.

The first week, since you were taken out of the public school system, was hard. It was the normal cycle: Lin would wake you up, eat breakfast with you, and if he could, Lin would take you to the Richard Rodgers Theater so you weren’t cooped up in the apartment all day. When he couldn’t take you with him, which wasn’t often, you’d just lay in bed, not eating or drinking anything. You just couldn’t be bothered to move. Your world was cracking and breaking all around you.

The Hamilton cast was worried about you just like Lin was. Whenever someone tries to hug or just be friendly with you, you’d flinch and it would worry everyone to no end. You’d just stay at Lin’s side for as much as you could. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust the cast, you just felt uncomfortable and you were a very antisocial person.

Besides Lin, you saw most of the cast as your family. Renée, Phillipa, and Jasmine were your sisters, Daveed, Anthony, Leslie, Oak, Jon, and Groff were your brothers, and Lac, Chris, and Kail were your uncles. They treated you as part of the family, always checking up on you and asking how you’re feeling. You actually stayed the night at Daveed’s place a couple of times. You also spent the night at Phillipa’s apartment too. The Schuyler Sisters (as you lovingly call Renée, Phillipa, and Jasmine) would ‘babysit’ you whenever Lin has to do something that makes him stay out late at night. It would usually be Phillipa and Jasmine who would spend the night with you until Lin got home.

Lin would also show you off on Twitter. He’d take a lot of selfies with you and tweet about how much he adores you and how excited he was to officially be your dad. His followers seem to like you too, but there were a few who didn’t really like you and would assault your Twitter and Instagram accounts with hate and insults, which pushed you further into darkness. Lin would assure you that those commenters were just joking and didn’t really wanted you dead. He must know how fragile your mental state was.

You wanted to believe him.

But it was too late for you.

~~~

It was a sunny day. You have been fake-sleeping for a few hours and was still pretending to be sleeping when Lin came to wake you up.

“I’m awake,” you said flatly just as you felt Lin touch your arm. You opened your eyes, staring blankly at the ceiling. “I didn’t sleep last night.”

Lin furrowed his brows in concern. “Are you okay?” He asked in his concern dad voice.

You sat up, shrugging your shoulders. “I just can’t relax. My mind won’t go into sleep mode, you know what I mean?” You twirled some hair around your fingers.

Lin frowned but nodded. “I can understand that. Well, we’re having a special guest so I need you to get dress. Nothing formal. Just don’t lounge around in your pajamas, please.” And with that, he left the room.

You nodded before getting out of bed. You were still sleeping in the trundle bed in Lin’s room since Lin hasn’t gotten around to cleaning out the spare room. You offered to do it but he brushed you off, telling you to focus on your classes that you didn’t have anymore. You just wished he’d give you something to do besides your online classes and taking your medication.

You took a cold shower and changed into your black pullover hoodie with the gold Hamilton logo on the chest, basketball shorts, and fuzzy socks. Lin got the hoodie for you from the Hamilton merchandise store across the street from the Richard Rogers. It was a ‘welcome-to-the-Hamilton-family’ gift, along with an ‘A.Ham’ snapback and a ‘Hamilton 2016’ crewneck fleece sweater. They were nice little gifts to act as part of a warm welcome into the limelight since you’re going to be in the spotlight because your new dad was a famous playwright.

You had just finished blow drying your unbrushed hair (which was now very fluffy and curly) when you heard the doorbell ring. You put the blow dryer back in the drawer and left the bathroom, walking into the living room while staring at the ground.

“(YN)!” You heard Lin call from the front hall. “Can you come here please?”

You let out a soft groan as you trudged into the front hall, stopping a few inches away from Lin. You looked up and saw a woman, about early-thirties, standing in the doorway, holding a baby carrier. You couldn’t see if there was a baby or not in the carrier since Lin was blocking your view.

“(Y/N), I’d like you to meet Vanessa, my ex-wife.” Lin introduced the woman with an uneasy smile.

You forced a polite smile on your face as you accepted Vanessa’s extended hand and shook it. Vanessa handed the baby carrier to Lin before murmuring something in his ear and then leaving. Lin closed the door and took the carrier into the living room, setting it on the coffee table and sitting on the couch, his wonder-filled eyes smiling on the inside of the carrier. As you slowly made your way to Lin’s side, you could hear baby noises coming from the carrier. You slowly sat down and peered into the carrier. You saw a baby with fluffy brown hair. He had Lin’s eyes and couldn’t be older than one or two. He was actually pretty adorable, too.

Lin turned and saw how you looked at his son with wonder. His smile grew brighter.

“This is Sebastian, your baby brother.” Lin introduced you to the baby. “He turns one in November. Would you like to hold him?”

You froze up, sitting back. “I-I don’t think that’s a good idea.” You stammered.

“It’ll be fine,” Lin said, taking Sebastian out of his carrier and holding him on his lap. “And I’ll be right here if you don’t want to hold him anymore.”

You were about to protest when Lin placed Sebastian in your lap. He took your wrists and guided your arms to wrap around the almost-one-year-old in an attempt at a hug. When Lin let go of your arms, you didn’t move them. Sebastian looked up at you with curious brown eyes and you felt your empty heart burst. He was just so cute. So innocent.

He was like Laurie.

You froze up at that thought. The memories of your sister’s suicide flashed in your mind in a feverish frenzy that you almost dropped Sebastian. You felt your heart start beating rapidly as your breath was hitched in your throat.

She stepped into traffic.

Car horns.

Crashing.

Screaming.

Her little body flying across the road.

Her beautiful blue eyes.

Sirens.

Her eyes.

Her blank stare.

Dull. Empty. Hollow.

Dead.

“(Y/N)?” Lin asked in concern. “Are you okay?”

You didn’t answer immediately. You watched Sebastian with a blank stare. He looked around the room with curiosity. He then looked up at you, staring into your eyes as if he knew what you were going through and if he understood how you felt. You felt captivated by this child’s stare that you couldn’t move or look away. Sebastian reached his small arms up at you. You held him by his torso and pulled him up so he was standing on his feet. His feet were planted on both of your thighs as he leaned forward and placed his little hands on both of your cheeks, squishing them.

“Sis.” He said in his soft squeaky voice.

That was when you broke down.

You let out a cry as if you were stabbed. You hugged Sebastian, not too tight though, and cried into his little shoulder. All of your self-hatred, all your depression, your sadness, your anger, your loneliness, your fears, your confusion, your pain, you sobbed it all out in painful wails, soaking Sebastian’s shirt with your pathetic salty tears. After a few moments, you pulled away, making Sebastian sit down on your lap as you hugged him, his head resting on your chest and your head resting sideways on top of his. Lin had a face of concern and confusion. Why were you crying? Were you happy to meet Sebastian? Or was there something you weren’t telling him?

“(Y/N)?” Lin spoke your name with concern. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”

You looked at him with teary eyes. You wiped away the stray tears before setting Sebastian back in his father’s lap. You let your hands fall into your lap, rubbing your palms over and over in habit. You didn’t look at Lin for a long time. You didn’t want to bother him with your problems. But… He wanted to help… You’re just a waste of his time. He saved you from your dad! He’s going to throw you out for sure.

You couldn’t think straight.

“(Y/N)?” Lin spoke again. “Hija, you know can tell me anything! You know I’m here for you, right?”

“But you’re always working.” You said flatly. “You’re not home during the days. And when you take me to the theater, I can’t have heart-to-hearts with you since everyone’s taking up your time. I feel like I can’t go to you when I need you.”

Lin frowned and placed Sebastian on the couch in between you. “(Y/N), what’s been bothering you? Have you been taking your medication?”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “So now you care? So now I’m more important than your stupid musical?”

Lin was taken aback from your smart remark. “Where did this all come from? You have been taking your meds, right?”

You crossed your arms across your chest and looked away from Lin. “Maybe.” You muttered.

“(Y/N)… Tell me the truth.”

You sighed. “I’ve been taking my meds. Don’t worry about it.”

“Why do I think you’re lying to me?”

You didn’t answer him.

“(Y/N).”

Nothing.

“(Y/N)?”

Don’t talk to him.

“(Y/N)!”

He doesn’t care.

“For fuck’s sake, (Y/N)! Look at me when I’m talking to you!”

“Leave me alone.” You retorted, standing up and turning to walk away. “I’m done talking to you.”

Just as you tried walking away, Lin grabbed your wrist tightly. You felt a sharp pain in your wrist. You were sure one of your cutting scars reopened itself because of Lin’s force. You could feel the blood seeping out of the broken skin.

“Let me go!” You cried, tugging at your arm.

“(Y/N), why can’t you talk to me?” Lin cried in frustration. “I thought we were friends.”

“We are friends, Lin…”

“Then talk to me, goddamnit! What’s wrong? I promise I won’t be mad. I just want to help you…”

“You wouldn’t understand…”

“Try me! I want to understand. I’m trying to understand! Please, talk to me!”

“Lin, please…”

“Why are you running away from me? What are you so afraid-“

That was when Lin felt the blood in between his fingers. He looked down and saw blood dripping from your wrist and onto the wooden floor. Lin felt sick to his stomach as he slowly rolled your hoodie sleeve up with his other hand, revealing multiple cuts and fresh scars. Most overlapped and others were still red. The two closest to your palm were the ones bleeding. Lin must have opened them when he grabbed your wrist. He was in shock and couldn’t move. Was this what you were afraid of?

“(Y/N)…” Lin murmured as you pulled your arm away, tears streaming down your face.

“Are you happy now?” You whispered. “Now you know. I hate myself so much that I’m destroying myself. I haven’t taken any of my meds in the past two weeks.” You rolled up your hoodie, revealing your hollow stomach and clearly visible ribcage and hip bones. You were basically a walking skeleton. “I haven’t been eating either.” You added. “Whatever I did eat, I’d throw it back up.”

Lin felt tears in his eyes. You were destroying yourself. You told him weeks earlier that you wanted to get better but here you were, slowly killing yourself, right before his eyes. He felt useless. He couldn’t help you since you wouldn’t allow him to. He wanted you to stay alive. He’s grown too attached to you to let you die.

“Why are you killing yourself?” Lin whispered, tears falling from his eyes. “Do you hate the world that much? Did your father take away your love for yourself so all it is left is hate and sadness? Are you so unhappy that there’s no other choice but to die?”

You felt your hard exterior slowly melt away. You felt… terrible. You didn’t think about what your self-destruction was going to do to Lin. You didn’t think about him. You were a selfish stupid bitch and didn’t think about the man who saved you from certain death and was going to give you a fresh start. Lin promised to look after and care for you. He was going to be the caring and loving dad you never had. He gave you a family. The cast of Hamilton and Sebastian were your family. Ally, Tayah, Grace, and Burmese were your family. You had a loving and caring family. Why were you going to throw that all away?

“I’m sorry…” You whimpered, tears falling down your face. “I’m so sorry, Lin. I’m such a selfish little bitch.”

Lin pulled you to his chest, hugging you tightly. “No… No, you’re not. It’s okay… It’ll get better. I promise, (Y/N). I swear it will get better. And I’ll be here every step of the way. I promise.”

You felt a tugging at your leg and looked down. Sebastian was standing there, hugging your leg while looking up at you with those beautiful brown eyes. You chuckled.

“Come here, honey.” You whispered as you picked him up and hugged him.

Lin hugged you both, completing the group hug. You felt safe and happy, whatever happy was. You didn’t know what it was but you will soon. As long as you have your family and love with you. You were going to be okay. Everything was going to be okay.

At least, you hoped it will.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [11/14]

Monday, January 26 (Two Days Later)~~ 

School starts up today.

Winter break was over.

You were so busy with getting kidnapped and in motion to be adopted by Lin to remember that school was starting up again. You forgot about tests and homework that was due. You were just too busy escaping from abuse and moving in with someone who will treat you well and raise you correctly.

The last couple of days of your break were of you and Lin just lounging on the couch and watching Disney movies. This was your way of bonding with Lin, who was going to be your legal dad soon. You’d lay with your head on his chest while he held you protectively, stroking your hair soothingly. Lin would hum a Spanish tune into your ears. It was a soothing lullaby; a nice melody full of words that meant nothing to you but meant worlds to Lin.

“What song is that…?” You asked in a hushed voice, not taking your eyes from the movie that was playing, which was The Little Mermaid.

Lin mumbled another Spanish phrase into your ear in a lulling voice, one you had grown to know was comforting and safe.

Something about Lin made you truly feel wanted in this world. His acts of kindness always keep you going, it was like having a true parent, something you’ve longed for your entire life. You believed you’d get this feeling from your mother but you have now realized that this feeling wasn’t going to come from that woman. She shoved you away for so long that when she tried to keep you to herself, she wasn’t who you wanted to be raised by. She wasn’t the loving and laid back mom you loved years ago. That woman was too independent and lost the motherly aura so long ago. You didn’t want her anymore. Now, you had Lin. He was the parent you always wanted and you were certain he will love and support you the way you always needed to be.

And now, here you were.

On the subway with Lin on an early Monday morning.

He was taking you to school.

You didn’t know if you should be elated or very embarrassed. I mean, Lin wasn’t an embarrassment, but he had his moments where you wanted to crawl under a rock and die. Lin was very goofy and loving but that’s what made him embarrassing. He was like those TV generic fathers who loves to embarrass his kids to no end. He likes to make dad jokes and coo at you like you were a baby, which really pisses you off. But, he was trying to be fatherly, which you enjoyed and loved about him.

You were dressed in a loose black t-shirt, jeans, and your worn out black converse. You were also borrowing Lin’s gray sweater, which was a couple size too big for you. Your hair had been violated by Lin with a hairbrush and because he wanted to be like all the other dads, he tried to braid your hair was failed miserably. You decided on braiding it yourself as you walked with him to the subway. Your backpack was filled with all the notebooks, textbooks, and supplies you left in it months earlier. It seemed a little lighter now that you had meat on your bones and were being treated for Anorexia. Lin also bought you an insulated lunch bag (like the ones on TV) and made you a homemade lunch, keeping with the diet your doctor put you on.

The subway was somewhat packed but you and Lin managed to get seats. You were still a little shaken up from the incident with Scott but you were back in a normal mindset thanks to the therapy you insisted you needed. It was nice to be able to talk to someone who knew just what to say to make everything better. You just wanted everything to go back to normal. You used to resent school but now you were actually somewhat excited since you were going to see your friends again.

The train stopped at your destination about a half hour after the last stop. Lin grabbed your hand and led you out, along with all the other high schoolers you didn’t realize were on the train with you. You stepped out of the station and led Lin down the street and after a couple of blocks, you stopped in front of the large building that was your high school. You recognized the large oak trees and all the senior athletes throwing around a football on the front lawn.

“Well,” You smiled up at Lin, trying to inch your hand out of his grip. “This is my school. Thanks for tagging along, Lin. I’ll see you at three o’clock, okay?”

Lin smirked. “Woah there, chica.” He said with a chuckle. “I need to take care of your paperwork. You know, since your birth parents aren’t in the picture anymore?”

You groaned as Lin kept a grip on your hand and led you through the front lawn and up the steps into the school building. You felt the stares and heard the whispers of all the students watching you, a sixteen-year-old nobody, being pulled through the hallways by a man in his thirties, who most of them assume was your uncle or a cousin. Lin didn’t let go of your hand until you made it to the front office. The secretary gave Lin directions to the Dean of Student’s office and wrote you a pass to your Homeroom.

“I’m gonna get a Visitor’s Pass and hang out with you at Lunch, okay?” Lin said as he hugged you goodbye.

You chuckled and rolled your eyes. “Okay, Lin. See you later.”

“Have a good morning, mi Hijo!”

~~~

You stepped back into the main hallway, feeling the atmosphere of the high school setting come back to you like a nostalgic haze. You listened to student chatter and then thumping of footsteps on the tiled floor. You could smell the cookies baking in the Culinary class down the hall, the bleach used to clean the floors and the smell of perspiration of the teenagers walking in the school all day. It seemed the lack of deodorant was still there just like it was when you left for winter break. All you needed was your schedule rememorized and your friends back at your side.

“(Y/N)!”

You turned around just as a flash of red crashed into you. You stumbled back but regain your balance as a girl with long and curly red hair hugged you tightly. She was dressed in a cream-colored sweater dress, black tights, and high tops. A checkerboard backpack hung from a shoulder, a black shoulder bag hanging from the other. The smell of No.5 Chanel filled your nostrils.

The girl pulled back, letting you get a good look at her face.

You immediately felt tears stream down your face.

“A-Ally!” You cried, hugging your best friend as tightly as she did moments earlier.

You pulled away after a few moments. You wiped away your tears and smiled brightly at your friend. She, on the other hand, was a blubbering mess, murmuring apologies because she didn’t know Scott was insane or a kidnapper. You assured her it wasn’t her fault but the tears kept coming. You stood there for a while longer before Ally calmed down.

“I’m just happy you didn’t end up dead in a ditch somewhere.” Ally murmured. “The night you hung up, I called all our friends and updated them. I only learned the next morning that you were kidnapped.”

“Well, I’m here.” You said. “I’m okay. I’m going to therapy but I’m okay.”

Ally’s soft features hardened. “Did he…” She leaned in. “Deflower you?”

You froze up. You didn’t say anything, answering Ally’s question almost instantly. She started weeping again and you comforted her, telling her it wasn’t her fault.

“But,” Ally sobbed. “I’m the one who let you go with him. I let you go on a date with a psychopath!”

You shushed Ally as students walked by, watching her sob-fest and whispering to each other.

“You didn’t know.” You said. “I didn’t know. We both didn’t know what he wanted or what he was capable of. But right now, he’s in custody and won’t be getting out for a while.”

Just then, the bell rang. You wrapped an arm around Ally’s shoulders and walked with her to homeroom, which was one of the many classes you shared with the redhead.

“Don’t worry,” You murmured. “Everything is going to be okay.”

Ally assumed you were talking to her, but really, you were assuring yourself.

~~~

Noon (Four Hours Later)~~

Lunch finally came around. You were on the edge of your seat most of the morning, just wanting to get started on your homework you didn’t complete and the new work you have to do. Most people didn’t notice your new more upbeat attitude, only because they never noticed you in general. The people that did, however, were your friends and harassers.

God, you just wanted a nice relaxing lunch period without the cheerleaders or the jocks making fun of you. You have been through enough already. Why add on to that?

Just as you entered the main hall, you were shoved forward from behind.

The sounds of snickers and bellowing laughter made you growl in annoyance. You stood up and retrieved your bag just as you were spun around to face your tormentors for the day.

Michelle, the head cheerleader, along with two other cheerleaders and her boyfriend, the head quarterback, Ashton, were laughing and pointing at you like you were a circus freak. You had been tortured by this slut since eighth grade when she moved here from Ontario and became Queen Bee. You were just a quiet teacher’s pet who was trying to make it through school and did nothing to upset or offend Michelle. But, she had to have all the attention, so she started picking on you constantly. This is how it’s been ever since.

“Can I help you, Michelle?” You said in a flat tone with a ‘really, bitch?’ look on your face.

Michelle just giggled and smiled sickly at you. “I just wanted to say ‘hi’ to my favorite nerd.” She said innocently.

You just rolled your eyes. “Uh huh,” You answered flatly. “Well, I have plans so…”

As you turned to walk away, Ashton grabbed your arm. You immediately slugged him in the arm as hard as you could, making him let go of your arm and hold his punched arm in pain.

“Did I ask for you to touch me, asshole?” You snapped, glaring daggers into the quarterback.

“Hey!” Michelle retorted her smile now a pissed off look that didn’t go well with her features that were drenched in makeup. “Watch who you’re talking too! You’re lucky we aren’t bashing your face in this time. I heard what happened to you during the break. You finally left home and became someone else’s problem. And then that freak Wilson got his hands on you. You’re lucky he did. No one else would want to touch you.”

“Shut up, Michelle, you stupid slut!” You yelled out of nowhere. “At least someone wanted to touch me. You haven’t been laid since you were dressing like a skank in eighth grade! Go find some pathetic football player to give a second-hand blowjob to!”

You didn’t know what came over you but, the moment you heard Michelle’s voice, this feeling of confidence and invincibility filled your blood. You felt like you could finally silence the bullies that have been tormenting you for four years.

The look of shock and anger on that pretty cheerleader’s face was priceless. She was gripping her Versace purse so tightly, you were surprised her fingerprints weren’t burned into the fabric. Her face was slowly turning red with rage. The other cheerleaders and even Ashton were trying to hold back laughter.

“You’re dead, (L/N),” Michelle growled. “Don’t look forward leaving school alive today.”

You just rolled your eyes and walked away. After you retrieved your lunch from your locker, you strolled into the cafeteria. The sounds of kids yelling and screaming along with bad rap music hit you in the face as you opened the doors. You looked around the sea of teenagers and lunch food before spotting who you were looking for; your friends all sitting at a circular table in the farthest corner of the large room. You maneuvered through the crowd and was getting closer and closer to the table but stopped when you noticed a person that stood out for the group of four girls.

There, sitting in your usual spot between Burmese and Ally, was Lin.

Yeah, your Lin.

You never felt so embarrassed in your whole life.

Your face was probably very red but you didn’t care. You never experience seeing a parent talking to your friends but now you wish you didn’t. Lin could be telling your friends anything. Like how he’s nursed you back to health and basically bathed you because of your fatigue. Or how he’s been showering you with embarrassing coos and fatherly compliments and jokes. You knew he was being sweet but it wasn’t something your friends should know since they’d use this information to tease you.

Lin was the first to notice you standing at the table. His already wide smile seemed to grow at the sight of you. He still was dressed in his sweatshirt, jeans, and sneakers with a messy man-bun, but now he had a ‘Visitor’s Pass’ sticker stuck to his sweatshirt. You saw a small stack of papers on the table in front of him, along with a tray of school food that had been almost completely untouched. He must not like the school lasagna either, it seems.

Mija!” Lin cheered at your arrival. “I met your friends. This is a wonderful bunch of young ladies. They have schooled me in the arts of ‘Identifying (Y/N)’s Actions and Mentality’.”

You rolled your eyes and Burmese stood up, letting you sit next to Lin while she sat in between Grace and Tayah. You pulled Lin’s tray closer and dug the plastic spork into the macaroni and cheese, one of the only things you liked from the school menu. After eating a few spoonfuls, you sat back and opened your lunch bag just as Lin pulled out a napkin and started cleaning off some excess cheese from the corners of your mouth. You slowly inched away but Tayah held you in place, allowing Lin to clean your face.

“I’m not a child, Lin!” You whined, making Lin roll his eyes.

“Well, you sure are whining like one.” Grace murmured, making everyone but you laugh.

You flipped her off but Lin smacked your hand. You grumbled to yourself as Lin stopped wiping your face and you went back to discovering your lunch for the day.

You pulled out a couple Tupperware containers and a plastic bag. In one container was a simple salad drenched in ranch and sprinkled with croutons and bacon bits. In another was leftovers from last night’s dinner; a Spanish casserole Lin’s mom brought over. In the plastic bag was just some barbecue-flavored potato chips. There was also a can of Pepsi and a fruit punch Capri Sun.

You smiled as you opened the casserole and took a heaping forkful, eating it all with a happy hum. You didn’t know, but Lin was watching you. He couldn’t understand how lucky he was. When you first showed up, you were a damaged and sick girl. You had nowhere to go and no one to turn to. But then, Lin took you in and nursed you and took care of you as best as he could. He saved you from meeting a fate similar to your sister. If only he could save her too. But nonetheless, you were alive and getting better. And soon, you were going to be Lin’s daughter. He was sure this was all just a dream come true.

“Continuing with the earlier conversation,” Burmese spoke after chugging her Coke. “Lin, why don’t you tell us about how you plan on taking care of our beloved (Y/N).”

Lin furrowed his brows. “Excuse me?”

“Well, anyone can just pull (Y/N) from her bastard father and nurse her from a fever.” Ally commented. “If you do plan on adopting and raising her, we, as her friends and sisters, need to know some things.”

“What kind of things?” Lin asked nervously.

All four girls exchanged mischievous smirks before turning back to you and Lin, Cheshire Cat grins on their faces.

“Can you get us tickets to Hamilton?” Tayah asked simply.

Lin blinked before chuckling in relief. You merely face placed and went back to stabbing your salad.

Your friends were going to be the death of you.

~~~

2:30 pm (After School)~~

You took your required textbooks from your locker and stuffed them into your backpack. It had been a long day. Besides Michelle teasing and tormenting you during P.E., you also had to deal with her in Math and World History. She just wouldn’t leave you alone. You were close to punching her right in her face if it wasn’t for Lin observing the class. You knew Lin being there was making the teacher uncomfortable, but Lin was too busy texting or reading to even see what was happening to you. Now, Lin was in the gym, along with the volleyball team you finally rejoined. This was the first practice since school started again. You were pretty excited.

You just closed your locker when your backpack was pulled off your shoulder, your lunch bag smacked out of your hands, and your body being pinned painfully to the lockers. You groaned softly in pain before opening your eyes, seeing that it was Michelle, Ashton, and one of her posse that was tormenting you once again.

“Well, well, well.” Michelle sang with an evil smile. “I told you you weren’t leaving this school alive, (L/N).”

“Fuck off, Michelle.” You hissed, trying to pry Ashton’s hands off of you. “I didn’t do anything but put you back in your place.”

Michelle batted her fake lashes at you innocently. “Really? Because I remember you saying I was a slut, and if I remember correctly, that counts as harassment and you could be reported and possibly suspended for that.”

“Well, I can tell on your ass too.” You shot back weakly.

Michelle giggled. “Don’t worry, (Y/N). We won’t need to go to that option.”

Just then, Michelle’s friend’s fist connected with your mouth, busting your lip open. You cried out a curse as you slumped slightly. The trio of tormentors laughed at you.

Then, the hell began.

Ashton released you, your body sliding down the lockers. You tried to stand up, but Michelle’s designer flats shoe connected with your stomach, all the breath you had being gone and your body began to curl up in the fetal position. The next few minutes felt like hours as you were assaulted with kicks, scratches, punches, hair-pulling, and verbal assaults as well.

“Bitch!”

“Ugly!”

“Whore!”

“Slut!”

“Useless!”

“Nothing!”

“Waste!”

You clutched your ears as you sniffled and whimpered. You wanted it to stop. You wanted all of this to just end already. Haven’t you suffered enough? You didn’t need this. You wanted to go home. You wanted Lin or anyone to save you. You wanted the kicking and yelling and punching to end. You didn’t want to feel this pain and sorrow anymore.

You wanted to be dead.

“Hey, asswipes!”

Your bullies turned to the end of the hall and froze. You slowly moved your head and looked over your bruised shoulder and couldn’t believe your luck.

There, standing with their phones out pointing at Michelle and her lackeys, were your friends, all four of them dressed in their gym attire and wearing knee pads from volleyball practice. Along with them was Lin, who stood frozen in shock and anger.

At the speed of light, the trio of asshole ran down the hallway, their footsteps pounding on the tiles. Burmese and Grace went running after, their phones still recording them. Tayah and Ally said something about getting the principal and ran down the other end of the hall. Lin walked quickly to you, who was still folded up in the fetal position.

“(Y/N)?” Lin whispered, softly laying a hand on your arm, making you flinch but then relax once you realized it was him.

You slowly unfolded yourself, laying fully on your back, and met eyes with Lin. Your lip was still bloody and your teeth and tongue were slightly stained with blood. Your back, stomach, and arms ached. You rolled off the sweater you wore and revealed black and purple bruises on your arms and stomach. Your nose was bloody too, the red liquid smeared on your nostrils and upper lip.

“Li…” You coughed, your throat dry from crying. “Lin… I can’t do it…”

Lin’s eyes widened and you saw tears pool around the lower eyelid. He tucked an arm under your neck and the other wrapped around your torso, pulling you closer to his chest. He tucked your head under his chin and he rocked back and forth, softly murmuring that Spanish lullaby he always sang to you.

Your head laid sideways on Lin’s shoulder as your body shook and you let out sobs and whimpers but no tears came. You felt so weak and useless. Maybe they were right? Maybe you were a waste? Surely you weren’t made to do anything. You’re just alive for the sake of being a daughter. You served your purpose already and you don’t have any other reasons to be alive. Maybe it’ll be okay to just end it all?

For now, you’re just a shell.

An unwanted, empty shell.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [10/14]

??? (??? Hours Later) ~~

You felt disgusting.

It had been a few hours since Scott left you alone after having his ‘fun’ with you. He let you stay in the living room while he cleaned the bed sheets. You changed from a shirt and shorts to Scott’s shirt and a pair of his boxers. You were shaking and your face was still red and wet with tears. You felt violated and very very uncomfortable. You wanted to erase the last few hours from your memory but you knew they were not going away. Once you get out of here, you’re going to schedule yourself some therapy to get over this traumatic event.

If you get out of here alive.

You heard the soft rumble of the dryer stop and your heart start beating out of your chest as footsteps padded through the room. Scott appeared in the corner of your eye. He was still shirtless but wearing flannel pajama pants and socks. His hair was slicked back since he had taken a shower earlier and his glasses were on the bedside table in his room. He was holding a white laundry basket with what you assumed was the now clean black and white bed sheets. You didn’t look at him but you felt him staring. You kept your head down and your eyes on your feet.

“I need to go to class today,” Scott said as he sat down on the couch next to you. He draped an arm over your shoulders, forcing you to hold back a flinch. “This means you’re going to be here all alone until I come home.”

“Y-You’re not going to chain me to the bedframe, like in the movies, are you?” You whimpered.

Scott chuckled. “No,” He said. “I trust you will behave while I’m gone.”

You sighed through your nose as he stood up and tilted your chin up to meet his eyes. He smiled so warmly, but you knew nothing but insanity and horror lived within those heart-melting green eyes. It was clear to you that Scott was a manipulative individual who only cared about himself and getting what he wants. He didn’t stop at anything if it came in between him and his goal.

He made that loud and clear to you when he took your innocence with no second thought.

“I’m going to go get ready.” Scott murmured before stealing a kiss from your bruised lips. “There are some pancakes for you in the kitchen. Try to eat something, okay?”

You simply nodded as he walked off to the bedroom and closing the door behind him.

You immediately rushed over to the staircase and quickly padded down to the ground floor. You strode over to the front door. You examined it and, to your relief, there were only two locks; both just needing to be turned to unlock. You noticed your shoes standing neatly next to the door and quickly slipped them on. You listened closely and heard the distant sound of the upstairs’ bathroom sink running before you unlocked the door and bolted out into the January morning.

The sun was barely over the horizon as you ran down the sidewalk to the house next door. You rang the doorbell and pounded on the door with all your might. You took a step back when you heard footsteps from inside and the door swung open, revealing an older woman, about sixty years of age, with her gray hair still in curlers and wearing a fuzzy bathrobe and slippers. She had a steaming mug of tea in her calloused hands.

“Why, good morning, my dear.” She greeted sweetly like any loving grandmother would. “What brings you here so early?”

You were shaking uncontrollably and you could work your voice. You were just so happy someone was next door and possibly could help you get back home to Lin. You just needed to get out of that hell house.

“M-My name is (Y/N).” You croaked out. “A-And I need-“

“(Y/N) (L/N)?” Another woman’s voice asked from inside the home.

You glanced past the old woman and saw a much younger woman, possibly her daughter, with curly red hair, still in her pajamas. She strolled up to you and looked you dead in the eye, making you shrink under her stare. The young woman’s eyes widened in realization and pulled you inside the house, closing the door behind you. Both women guided you into the living room and the older woman sat down next to you while her daughter rushed into the kitchen. The daughter returned with a phone.

“I must make sure you are truly (Y/N) (L/N) before I call the police.” The daughter said. “Were you kidnapped?”

You nodded.

“Did you get taken two days ago?”

Your eyes widened. “I-It’s been two days?” You whispered.

The daughter nodded. “Do you know the name of your kidnapper?”

“S-Scott Wilson. He lives right next door.”

The mother lets out a surprised sound. “He seemed like such a good boy! He helps Gwendolyn here all the time with household chores.”

Gwendolyn shook her head. “I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I knew something was wrong with that boy but I never knew he’d do something like this. Is there anyone you can call to come get you before I call the police?”

You were about to speak when there was a loud knocking coming from the front door. Gwendolyn’s mother stood up and walked over calmly to the door. She opened the door and held the same calm face she had when you were at the door.

“Ah, Scott. What a nice surprise.” The mother greeted the visitor with a soft smile.

You felt like you were going to vomit. Gwendolyn pulled you over into the kitchen and handed you the phone. You immediately dialed and held the phone up to your ear and waited for it to be picked up.

You heard a click.

“This is Lin.” A familiar voice greeted.

“I-It’s quiet outside of town, Lin.” You murmured.

The line went silent before you heard a sound of surprise.

“(Y/N)?” Lin asked frantically. “Are you okay? Mija, where are you?”

You recited the question to Gwendolyn, who told you the street address. You echoed the address to Lin.

“That’s only twenty minutes away. I’m on my way. Where’s Scott?”

“At the door. I ran out of his house and sought refuge next door. These two women recognized me and they’re going to call the police as soon as I hang up.”

You heard Lin sigh in what you believed was relief. “Thank God.”

“I’ll see you in a while, yeah?”

Lin choked back a sob and chuckled weakly. “Y-Yeah. You will. See you later, Mija.”

“Bye, Lin.”

“See you soon.”

~~~

7:32 AM (30 minutes later) ~~

Lin pulled up to the brick two-story house and threw himself out of the car, racing up to the front door and knocking loudly. The door swung open moments later and a redheaded young woman greeted him.

“Are you Lin?” She asked.

“Yes, I am,” Lin answered. “Where’s (Y/N)?”

Gwendolyn took a step to the side and Lin stepped in, scanning the room before his eyes landed on you. He raced over to you and swept you up in his arms, holding you close. He started crying like he did in the car on his way there. You started sobbing softly, burying your face in his jacket, grabbing fists full of the soft material. Your knees went weak and you both were kneeling on the floor, not letting go of each other.

The police showed up a few minutes later. They found Scott locked in the bathroom upstairs. He tried to fight against the officers, but he was tasered and handcuffed, carried to a squad car and strapped into the backseat. You gave your statement to an officer and a search team went into Scott’s house and retrieved the black duffle bag with your clothes. You thanked the women for helping you and then followed Lin to his car.

You two sat in the car in silence, watching the squad cars pull out and drive down to street until they disappeared. You let realization sink in and sat back into the seat.

This nightmare was over.

Scott was gone.

Everything was okay.

Lin turned his attention to you. “Did he…” He gulped. “Did he do anything to you?”

You froze up. You averted your eyes from Lin and nodded.

Lin turned the car on and gripped the steering wheel tightly. “I’m sorry, (Y/N).”

You shook your head. “It’s not your fault.” You murmured. “I didn’t know he was insane.”

“Well,” Lin took a deep breath as he pulled away from the house. “Your mom thinks otherwise.”

You looked up at Lin with wide eyes. “My mom’s back in New York?”

Lin nodded, keeping his eyes on the road. “She’s not happy with me right now.”

You frowned. “Why? Because you saved me from my abusive father?”

Lin shook his head.

“Because I got really sick under a circumstance that you weren’t a part of?”

He shook his head again.

“Then what?”

Lin stopped at a stoplight and looked at you, his eyes glassy and filled with tears. You froze a look of confusion and shock on your face.

“She’s taking you to Germany.” He stated. “You’re leaving as soon as possible.”

~~~

9:12 AM (Two Hours Later) ~~

“Where is my baby?!”

You flinched at the sound of your mother’s voice as she entered the police department. You had your head resting on Lin’s shoulder, his arm draped over yours. You had to process through a lot of paperwork and take part in a lie detector test, which you passed of course. Now, you were to be transferred to your mother’s care as soon as possible.

You didn’t want that at all.

For your whole life, you believed that your mother would keep you safe. She would whisk you away from New York City and raise you happily and lovingly in Albany. You would be a happy girl and marry your prince charming and live happily ever after.

But then you met Lin.

Lin was a wonderful human being.

He took you in and nursed you back to health. He fought beside you against your father and even bought you gifts for your sixteenth birthday while your mom was off on a trip to the Caribbean. He basically became your new father. And you were very happy in Lin’s care. You didn’t want to leave. All your friends were in NYC. You were going to take up more activities here. You were going to take up therapy to help get through your PTSD.

But now, your mom wanted to take you far away from that.

And you hated that.

Your mother strolled over to you, grabbing your arm and pulling you away from Lin.

“Keep your hands off my baby!” She hissed. “I don’t need you soiling my child anymore.”

“Mom, stop it.” You shot back at her, causing her to look at you in shock. “It’s not Lin’s fault.”

“Oh, of course, it is, (Y/N)!” Silvia exclaimed, getting the attention of the officers and secretaries around you. “I know, you are naive and stupid to realize that all men are just pigs but-“

“You’re wrong!” You yelled, silencing your mother. “Lin-Manuel Miranda is anything but a pig! He is a loving, caring individual. He took me in and fought alongside me against my abusive father. He nursed me back to health and bought me birthday presents while you were off whoring with Caribbean men! Lin is more of a parent to me then you’ll ever be!”

The room went silent. Your mother stared at you blankly while you took steps back and stopped when you felt Lin’s hand take yours.

“I want to be adopted by Lin.” You stated simply. You then turned to Lin. “If that’s okay with you.” You added.

Lin smiled. “Of course.” He said.

Your mother cleared her throat and calmly readjusted her apparel before looking at you blankly.

“If that’s what you want (Y/N), then so be it.” She said before she calmly walked out of the building, not looking back.

You watched her leave and then turned to Lin. He was smiling at you, his eyes showing warmth and pure happiness. You mirrored his smile instantly. Your dreams were coming true. You were going to be in a loving and safe household. You were going to stay in New York City with your friends and family. You were going to get the help you needed. Everything was going to be alright.

You were going to get your happily ever after.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [9/14]

??? (??? Hours Later) ~

You woke up with a pounding headache and a throbbing pain in your shoulder and lower regions. You felt sick but also very hungry. You were laying on a bed, you assumed from the firm but comfortable mattress you were laying on and the soft comforter that covered your body. You slowly opened your eyes but squeezed them shut because of the bright light of the ceiling fan. You rubbed your eyes and slowly sat up. You blink a few times, your eyes adjusting to the light. Once your eyesight adjusted, you felt your blood run cold when you realized where you were.

You were in a large bedroom, possibly the master bedroom. You were sleeping on a king size bed, covered in black sheets and black pillows. The room was covered wall-to-wall in polaroid photographs and papers containing writing or drawings. The bathroom door was on the left-hand wall, the doorway open. The door must have been taken out. There was a flat screen television hooked up against the wall across the room from you, a table with multiple gaming consoles underneath it. You saw a dresser in the corner next to a curtain-less window. That familiar black duffle bag sitting on the top of the dresser.

You slowly moved off of the bed, standing up. Thankfully, you were still wearing the clothes you were wearing before you blacked out. Your knees wobbled but you managed to walk normally. You walked over to the window. It was still nighttime, so you weren’t asleep for that long. You saw the distant lights of New York City, making you assume you were still in the city, just someplace secluded. The lights of the houses surrounding your ‘prison’ were turned on, revealing that you were in a neighborhood. All the houses were normal two-stories with small porches and two-car garages. Scott’s family must be very financially stable to own a house like this.

You moved past the window, looking at the photographs and papers pinned to the white-painted walls. Some of the photos were blurry but you could make out a girl in all of the pictures. Most of the clear photos confirmed your thinking and made you freeze. They were pictures of you. You at the mall, you at the bus stop, you in class, you talking with Ally and your other friends, just photos of you everywhere. The papers were either drafts of the poems Scott emailed to you throughout the months or sketches of you in various poses and facial expressions, most of them were of you sitting down and smiling.

You felt your stomach churn. It was flattering but also creepy that Scott took so many photos of you and drew you multiple times. Was he really that obsessed with you? What were his plans for you? What could cause someone to fall so in love with a person that it became an unhealthy obsession?

One thing was for sure,

You needed to get out.

The sound of the bedroom door opening made you jump and turn around. Scott entered the room, holding a backpack in one hand. He wasn’t wearing a shirt but was wearing ripped black jeans and socks. His glasses sat on the top of his head, his hair messy and covering his eyes. He closed and locked the door behind him and tossed the backpack onto the bed.

You shuffled backward and stopped when your back hit the wall. You stayed quiet, waiting for Scott to speak. He brushed his hair out of his eyes and looked into your eyes. His eyes were that same gorgeous green that made your heart race, even if he was a kidnapping psychopath. His face was blank but his lips slowly curled into a soft, almost apologetic, smile. You felt your body shake as you pressed yourself closer and closer to the wall.

“Good morning, baby,” Scott said in a soft low voice, slowly making his way towards you.

“Don’t.” You said, finding your voice, which was shaky and low from sleep. “Don’t you dare come closer.”

Scott stopped for a moment but walked up to you, planting both hands on each side of your head, trapping you against the wall.

“I missed you.” He murmured into your ear. “I didn’t wanna try anything so I slept on the couch. I knew girls liked their space.”

“W-What do you want with me?” You asked, fear clear in your voice.

Scott chuckled lowly in your ear before trailing light kisses from underneath your ear, across your jawline, and down your neck. He held your waist in place, not letting you move. He stopped at your collarbone and looked up at you. His eyes had a playful gleam but were glazed over in lust.

“I want you, (Y/N).” He said in a husky voice, his hands trailing down to your hips and gripping them tightly, almost bruising them. “I want you, right here. Right. Now.”

Your breath was stuck in your throat and your eyes widened. “I-I don’t want that.” You whispered in fear.

Scott frowned and pulled you up against the wall, wrapping your legs around his waist. He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.

“I didn’t ask what you wanted.” He said growled walking backward, taking you with him, and falling forward onto the bed, pinning you between him and the mattress.

“S-Scott..” You whimpered as he bit and nibbled at your neck. “P-Please… stop.”

Scott chuckled. “And where’s the fun in that?” He then pulled out a black strip of fabric and tied it over your mouth, using it as a make-shift gag. You whimpered and cried, but it was muffled by the gag.

“Now, you be a good girl and let Scottie make you feel all better, okay?” He purred into your ear.

You whimpered again in response.

“Good.”

And with that, Scott slowly started to remove your shorts, kissing and sucking on your neck as he did so.

~~~

Monday, 9:34 am (Thirteen Hours Later) ~

Lin didn’t sleep a wink last night.

He couldn’t stop thinking about you. He couldn’t stop thinking about what exactly Scott wanted to do to you. Lin was beating himself up about why in the hell he didn’t take you with him to the theater. Why in the hell did he let a helpless fifteen-just-turned-sixteen-year-old stay home without any supervision? You must have stayed home alone a lot when your dad had you in his custody.

He promised to protect you.

He promised himself that he’d protect and take care of you as long as he can until your mom was back in the US. He promised to make sure you never end up killing yourself like your sister did. He wanted you to be safe and happy. He wanted you to be properly taken care of.

He didn’t expect this to happen.

Lin was sitting at the dining room table, searching and scanning the poems you saved in your emails for some kind of sign that foreshadowed Scott’s actions last night. He found nothing in the past hours. They were just love letters. You deleted all of the creepy emails he sent but the police found them with some help of FBI hackers. Now they were tracking the email account to try and find Scott’s house.

“Lin?”

Lin looked up and saw Chris in the doorway, holding his daughter, who was rubbing her eyes and yawning.

“Lin, what are you doing up so early?” Chris asked, walking into the room and going straight for the kitchenette. He sat his daughter on the counter as he made himself a cup of coffee.

“I’m going through her emails,” Lin said. “There has to be something that foreshadowed why this kid took mi Hija.”

“‘Your daughter’?” Chris looked at Lin with a smirk. “Did you just call (Y/N) your daughter?”

Lin felt his face heat up and he flipped Chris off. “Shut up.” He grumbled.

Just then, Lin’s phone was ringing. He didn’t recognize the number but still answered.

“This is Lin,” Lin said his usual greeting.

You ignorant bastard!” A shrill woman’s voice screamed through the phone, making Lin jump and almost drop the phone. “Do you have any idea what the fuck you have done?

Lin cleared his throat and held his phone so there was a gap between it and his ear. “Who is this?”

Silvia (L/N).” The woman said, still sounded pissed as hell. “(Y/N)’s mother.

“Ah, Ms. (L/N).” Lin nervously chuckled. “How’s your business trip?”

That isn’t any of your business, Mr. Miranda,” Silvia yelled. “What I need to know is why in the hell did you let Scott Wilson kidnap my daughter.

“I didn’t know Scott was a bad kid,” Lin said in his defense. “He seemed nice. Look, I’m trying to figure out what he wants with (Y/N).”

Obviously, he wants to take my baby’s innocense and use her like a toy! Just like her father!” Silvia cried.

Lin frowned, not considering that motive. Scott could just want you for sex and then let you go. Or, he’d kill you after having his way with you. Lin pushed all those bad thoughts away, trying to keep optimistic.

“Ms. (L/N), do you know if Scott has any illnesses or problems?” Lin asked.

Well, his mother drowned in a bathtub two years ago,” Silvia explained. “His father shot himself in the head six months ago, but everyone says that Scott did it because his father was an alcoholic abuser.

“Would there be any logical reason he’d be obsessed with (Y/N)? Why would he kidnap her and take some of her clothes too if he intends on raping her and then killing her like you think he will?”

Silvia went silent. “Oh my god.” She whimpered. “He’s planning on keeping her. Like a pet.

“Not if I can help it.” Lin had a determined tone and he felt his determination burning in his heart. “I’ll make sure (Y/N) gets out of there alive and Scott doesn’t see the light of day again.”

Thank you, Mr. Miranda,” Silvia said before clearing her throat. “And once my daughter is safe, I’m taking her with me to Germany.

Lin froze. His heart stopped, His eyes widened. The room seemed to stop.

“I-I’m sorry.” He stammered. “Did you just say you were moving to Germany?”

Of course,” Silvia answered. “New York has nothing for me and (Y/N). Laurie is dead and their father is in jail. My job is transferring me to Germany and I intend on taking my eldest daughter with me. It’s not that I don’t appreciate your help, Mr. Miranda, I do, but you have proven that you can’t keep my daughter safe from men that might want her for her virtue and childish ignorance. Once (Y/N) is safe and Scott is arrested, I’m putting myself and her on the first plane out of New York. Good luck, Lin.

And with that, she hung up.

Lin didn’t move. He stared blankly at the wall opposite of him. He slowly processed what was just said before your mother hung up.

Once you were found, you were being forced to move to Germany.

Lin should be happy. You were going to be with your mom like you wanted. You were going to be happy and safe. You were going to be taken care of and far away from your abusive father and stalker boyfriend.

But there was one problem.

Lin didn’t want you to leave him.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [8/14]

Sunday (Three Week Later) ~

You had to turn off your phone.

It’s been three weeks since your date with Scott and his way-too-early marriage proposal. Since then, he’s been sending you emails like usual, but they were more intense poems and him just straight out explaining how much he loved you and what your future was going to be like with him. He wanted two children, a condo in Florida, and you could be a stay-at-home mom while we worked. You were flattered but also creeped out by these emails. You deleted the creepy ones and saved the normal poems. You assumed that maybe Scott was very antisocial and didn’t know how to properly date someone.

Then, the phone calls started.

At first, they were only during the day, one or two at a time. You’d answer and the only answer would be heavy breathing before the caller would hang up. You were creeped out and a little scared but nothing too terrifying. Slowly, the calls got more often, resulting in you getting about four a day and instead of heavy breathing, it was Scott’s voice, singing all your favorite songs for about a minute and then stopping, hanging up. You were confused and a little creeped out. How did Scott get your number? Did Ally give him it? You had called Ally and asked, her answer making your blood run cold.

“I didn’t give him your number.” She said. “I got you a new phone so I gave him that number.”

“Ally,” You were shaking slightly as you spoke. “I don’t use that phone. I’m not using it until I run out of minutes on this one, which won’t be for a while.”

“Well, it sounds like he’s slowly becoming obsessed with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“(Y/N), the boy literally proposed to you on the first date. There’s something wrong with him. And didn’t you say he declared you as his?”

“In an angry possessive way..”

“Now you understand, right?”

You were about to answer when you saw something in the corner of your eye. You turned and looked out the window. It was nine o’clock at night, so the sky was black but the distant glow of New York City and the shops below lit up your view and reflected on the window, some of the artificial light seeping into the room. The curtains were wide open, no shutters covering the glass. You walked closer to the window and looked out to the streets below. Cars drove back and forth on the street as people of all shapes, sizes, and colors walked down the sidewalk, dressed in flashy clothes or bundled up in coats. You noticed a few that were standing still here and there but most of them turn and start walking in either direction.

All except one.

There, standing on the edge of the sidewalk, mere inches from traffic, was a tall boy. He wore a black hoodie with the hood up, covering most of his ginger hair, black jeans, and dirty sneakers. He wore full-rim black glasses over his green eyes, that held a piercing and rageful glare that pierced through you and probably could burn holes into your skin.

“(Y/N)?” Ally’s voice came over the other end of the ongoing phone call. “Is something wrong?”

You couldn’t speak. You were frozen in fear. You couldn’t look away from his stare. He rose his hand from his hoodie pocket and held out his phone. You could barely see the white glow of the screen. Not a second later, a ringtone rang through the apartment, making you jump. You slowly rushed to the bedroom where your new iPhone was ringing. You looked at the caller ID. It was a phone number you didn’t recognize, but you were sure it was his. You didn’t want to answer it, but you had to know. Why was he stalking you? Why was he scaring you? Was this just some sick game?

“(Y/N)!” Ally screamed from the phone you held to your ear.

“I’m gonna call you back.” You said before hanging up and placing your phone on the dresser and picking up the new phone. You walked back to the window and saw he was still there. You took a gulp of air and answered the call. You watched as he placed the phone up to his ear.

“About time you answered.” Scott’s voice came out of the phone’s speakers, annoyance, and anger clear in his tone.

“What do you want, Scott?” You asked in a shaky but cold tone.

“What do I want?” He asked in a mocking tone before chuckling darkly. “I think we both know what I want. I want you, (Y/N). I want you and you alone. I want you to be mine.”

“Well, scaring me isn’t gonna make me fall for you.” You hissed, glaring at him, making him smirk.

“I don’t mean to scare you, baby.” You flinched at the pet name he used. “I just want you to realize that I’m not letting you go anytime soon.”

“Fuck off, Scott.” You said, your voice cold and clear. “I thought you were nice. If you didn’t scare me off with that proposal I would have given you a chance.”

“And you would have still run off if you saw how I truly was.” Scott finished your sentence with a flustered tone. “Honestly, (Y/N). I’m seventeen. I’ve been around the block once or twice.”

“What do you want from me?” You asked, your voice shaking and soft as tears filled your eyes. “I didn’t do anything to you, Scott.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, (Y/N),” Scott said, his voice low. “You did do something to you. You made me feel alive again. After my mom died, I didn’t think I’d ever feel alive again. I was empty. But then, you came into my life.”

“I never talked to you..” You murmured.

“No, you didn’t. But you just being here and being alive made my heart race. Call it love at first sight.”

You frowned, whimpering and sniffling.

“Oh, I’m sorry princess. Did I scare you?” Scott asked in a worrisome tone that made your stomach churn. “Do you want me to come up there and make you feel better?”

“You can’t get in.” You said, your voice hoarse and soft. “You don’t have a key.”

Scott smirked. “Who said anything about keys?” And with that, he hung up and you watched as he calmly walked into the apartment building.

You felt your heart rise up to your throat. You ran to the front door and made sure it was locked tight. You were shaking and softly sobbing without realizing it. You ran into the bedroom and tossed the iPhone you were holding onto the bed, grabbing your phone and dialing Lin’s number. You held the phone to your ear as you shook.

Mija!” Lin’s happy voice cheered through the speaker. “How are you? What do you-“

“Lin, Scott is coming to get me.” You said simply, your voice shaking and full of fear.

Lin went silent. “What do you mean he’s ‘coming to get you’?” He asked in a serious tone.

You whimpered. “He was standing outside the building and I saw him enter the building. He called me, Lin. He’s the weird phone calls I’ve been getting. He said he was going to make me his and he was coming up to make me feel better.”

“Okay, okay. Calm down, (Y/N).” Lin’s voice was shaking to. You knew he was scared for your life as much as you were. “Are all the doors and windows locked?”

“Yes. I made sure they all were.”

“Okay. Call 911. I’ll be home as fast as I can.”

“But, Lin-“

Mija,” Lin’s serious tone cut you off. “I should have made you come with me. I’m sorry I’m not there. I’m getting out of the theater as we speak. I’ll be home in twenty minutes. Please be safe.”

“Lin,” You were basically sobbing now. “I-If I don’t survive-“

“Don’t say that, (Y/N).” You could hear the rumble of Lin’s car in the background. “Scott isn’t going to hurt you. Just call 911 and they’ll take care of it. I need to focus on the road now so please do what I say, okay?”

“O-Okay.” You said, calming down from your sobbing.

“Hey,” You heard Lin’s voice go soft. “Te Amo, mi Hijo.” And then, he hung up.

You didn’t understand Spanish and couldn’t understand what he said before hanging up. You didn’t have the time to. You dialed 911 and held the phone up to your ear just as a light knocking came from the front door.

“(Y/N),” Scott’s voice sang from behind the door. “Let me in, my princess. I’ve come to make you feel all better.”

You flinched and sat in a dark corner of the living room, out of view from the entryway.

“911, what is your emergency?” A woman’s voice came from the other side of the phone.

You let out a sound of relief before speaking. “T-There’s someone at the door. He’s trying to get in and get to me. Please send help.”

“Alright, ma’am. What is your address?” The operator asked.

You gave her the street address and what apartment you were in. The operator said it was going to take about twenty minutes for the police to get to you. You softly cursed under your breath as you heard that blasted iPhone start ringing from the bedroom. You stayed where you were and the light knocking turned into thunderous pounding on the front door.

(Y/N)!” Scott yelled-but-also-sang. “Open the—open the door, please. (Y/N), open the door.

You recognized the tune. Mean to be Yours. From the musical Heathers. You loved that musical.

(Y/N), can we not fight anymore, please? Can we not fight anymore?” Scott continued singing as he jangled the door knob.

You shook in fear, begging the operator for the police to come faster, the operator apologizing that the police were taking too long.

(Y/N), sure, you’re scared, I’ve been there. I can set you free!” You heard what sounded like a foot kicking at the door, trying to break it down.

“Oh, god.” You murmured, placing the floor next to you and folding your hands together, murmuring prayers as tears spilled down your face. You were so scared for your life. You just wished that Scott would stop and go away, find some other girl to be obsessed with.

(Y/N), don’t make me come in there! I’m gonna count to three!” You heard Scott yell as he jiggled the door knob. You could hear the knob slowly giving up as Scott’s surprising strength shook and pulled it. You let out a scream when you heard the door knob snap, the lock clicking, signaling that the door was unlocked.

One,” Scott slowly opened the door.

Two,” you covered your mouth with your hands as you heard his footsteps get closer.

You felt your heart stop when you didn’t hear his footsteps anymore. You were screaming prayers in your head, wishing to every star that Lin was close by and almost home.

Three!

You let out a scream of pure terror as Scott grabbed your ankles and dragged you out of your hiding spot. You kicked and fought Scott as he threw you over his shoulder and grabbed a black duffle bag you didn’t recognize before running out of the apartment. You continued to scream until Scott dropped you and held you close, jabbing you in your pressure point between your neck and collarbone. You almost instantly lost consciousness as Scott picked you back up and carried you out of the building through the back staircase.

~~~

The police showed up ten minutes after Scott left.

They searched the whole apartment and couldn’t find you, only traces of Scott’s and your fingerprints. They took both your phones in for evidence in the case, along with the shoes you were wearing but kicked off in your struggle. They dusted the whole place, only finding yours, Scott’s, and Lin’s fingerprints. But, Lin’s fingerprints were overlapped by yours.

Lin raced down the street, going about five miles over the speed limit. He was scared out of his mind. His mind was racing. His palms were sweaty. His heart was racing. His breathing was heavy and labored.

He knew something was off with that Scott kid.

Pulling into the parking lot, Lin got out of the car and immediately saw the police but no ambulances, to his relief. He jogged over to the police officers.

“Excuse me,” Lin asked, getting both NYPD officers’ attentions. “What happened? Did someone get arrested?”

“A young girl got kidnapped.” Said the officer leaning against the squad car, sipping on a cup of coffee. “Her crazy boyfriend didn’t like being rejected so he broke in a kidnapped her, along with some of her clothes.” He took a long drink of coffee. “Must intend to keep her for a long time.”

Lin’s heart stopped. He froze, his eyes widening and his skin draining of color.

“(Y/N)…” He murmured. Tears slowly filled his eyes as he crumpled to the ground, whimpering like a child. “I-I couldn’t protect her.” He choked out.

Both officers kneeled next to him. “Are you okay, sir?” The other officer asked, a concerned look on his face. “Did you know the kidnapped girl?”

Lin looked up, tears running down his face. “S-She’s staying with me.” He explained. “I promised to protect her.. Why didn’t I realize he was insane…?”

“You’re looking after the girl?” The officer with the coffee asked, taking out a pad of paper and a pen.

Lin gave his statement and begged for the officers to find you. The officers shared a look before promising to find you and leaving in the squad car. Lin couldn’t stay in his apartment because it was considered a ‘crime scene’ and also, the door knob was broken. Lin called up Chris and asked if he could stay with him and his family. After telling Chris what happened, Chris showed up about five minutes later and took Lin home after getting some clothes.

Lin spent the car ride looking out of the window, hating himself for not taking you to the theater with him. You were sixteen, thus making you old enough to stay home alone, but Lin had a bad feeling about Scott and he brushed it off, believing you knew what you were doing.

“She’s a kid, for Christ’s sake!” Lin exclaimed, pounding his forehead against the window.

Chris looked at Lin with a concerned look before focusing back on the road, not saying a word.

Lin started forward, watching as the rain began to pour down on the car. He sank down into his seat, a determined look blazing in his eyes like a raging fire.

Don’t worry, (Y/N). He thought. I’ll find you. I’ll bring you home.

Scott Wilson is a dead man.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [7/14]

Saturday 7:45 pm (Two Days Later) ~

You had gotten to The Public Theater around noon that eventful Saturday. Besides it being the premiere of Hamilton, it was your sixteenth birthday. Lin had woken you up around seven like usual, but he had a tray of breakfast ready for you. You ate breakfast in bed before Lin revealed that he had presents for you. Opening them from the smallest to largest, Lin had gotten you a glass makeup container, a new hairbrush, two-hundred dollars worth of new clothes from Hot Topic and Forever 21, and a spa treatment gift basket. You only knew Lin for a week and he was basically your new dad. You told him you didn’t expect nor wanted any birthday gifts from him, the best gift you had ever gotten was him saving you from your horrible father. Lin just brushed you off and still got you stuff. You felt terrible when you found out Lin’s birthday was last Tuesday, not getting him anything that could show how much you appreciated him and his kindness. Of course, he told you not to worry about it, but you still felt bad. You had decided that you’ll get him something for the musical’s premiere that will show how much you appreciate him and his selflessness towards you.

It was about fifteen minutes until the last show of the night. The first show was around noon and you didn’t get to the theater until after the first act, forcing yourself to wait for Lin in his dressing room for the remainder of the show. He was surprised that you didn’t watch the show but only laughed when you told him your reasoning.

“You really are something else, (Y/N).” Lin murmured to himself, not expecting you to hear him.

You weren’t in your dress when you had gotten to the theater and now here you were, getting ready for your ‘date’ in the ladies bathroom in the lobby. It wasn’t very crowded but you managed to have enough vanity space to place all your makeup out before you and apply it. You had applied the wine-red and black eyeshadow in a smokey eye style you saw a tutorial for on YouTube. The matte wine-red lipstick was liquid and you used the gloss brush to apply it in quick and clean strokes. You had slipped on your dress, accessories, and shoes on back in Lin’s dressing room before he returned during the intermission and managed to curl your hair with the help of some aides from the makeup department.

After applying setting powder and looking over for any mistakes, you collected the makeup back into the carrying case and places it into the small black clutch purse you were borrowing from Phillipa Soo, who played Eliza in the musical. You stepped out of the bathroom and then realized how crowded the lobby was. You scanned the crowd, looking for who you hoped your ‘secret admirer’ looked like. You really wished he gave you a phone number so you could call him to make sure he was on his way. Maybe he ditched you? Maybe he was too shy or scared and decided not to come? You started thinking of all the worst things that could have happened.

“(Y/N)!”

Your head snapped to where you heard your name being called and saw two familiar faces. One was a girl about your age. She was slightly taller than the boy she was linked arms with. The girl had curly-almost-frizzy scarlet-red hair that stopped at her waist, pale skin, cerulean-blue eyes, and freckles covering her cheeks, nose, shoulders, arms, and collarbone. She was dressed in a strapless short black cocktail dress that hugged her body in all the right ways, along with red stilettos and white gloves.

The girl’s date(?) was a little shorter than the girl, probably because of her wearing heels. He had messy ginger-red hair, lightly tanned skin, gorgeous emerald-green eyes, and freckles covering the bridge of his nose and cheeks. He wore a pair of full-rim black glasses that went well with the black suit he wore. You couldn’t help but notice the red bow tie he was wearing.

“Ally!” You squealed when you saw your best friend. You both hugged and Ally mirrored your bright smile. “Thank god you’re here! I thought you were still in Haiti for that family vacation.”

Ally shook her head. “Got home early because my mom has work to do. And I couldn’t miss your sixteenth birthday! What kind of friend would I be?” She then reached into her purse and pulled out a small rectangular package that was wrapped in colorful paper. “Here.”

You raised an eyebrow and pulled the paper off of the package. Your eyes widened and you let out a loud squeal, hugging Ally tightly when you realized it was a new iPhone. Ally laughed and hugged you back, smirking when you pulled away.

“Ally, you’re the best!” You exclaimed, putting the new phone into your clutch. You then remembered the ginger boy next to your friend. “Is this your date?”

Ally’s smirk widened. “Actually,” She took a step sideways, letting you and the boy stand side by side. “He’s your date.”

You blinked, looking from the boy to Ally and then back to the boy, who was blushing and smiling sheepishly.

“H-Hey, (Y/N).” He stammered, his voice shaky but still sounding how a normal seventeen-year-old New Yorker boy should sound. “Y-You probably don’t remember me. I-I’m Scott Wilson. We h-have Algebra together?”

You scanned your memories for a ‘Scott Wilson’ and then realized why he looked so familiar. He sat at your assigned table in Algebra and never really talked much, mainly reading comic books or carving vulgar things into the desk surface. The only talking you did was morning greetings and group work.

“Oh yeah!” You said, smiling. “It’s nice to see you Scott, but I’m waiting for-“

“Your email Shakespeare?” Scott finished your sentence, slowly becoming more confident. “That would be me.”

Your eyes widened. S.W. That made sense. Getting a good look at Scott, you realized he wasn’t ugly. He was pretty cute. His voice was adorable when it was shaking with nerves and anxiety. He seems to be a nice boy. He was pretty smart but not very social, but you weren’t either. Maybe this could work?

“Oh,” You said after a long pause. “That makes sense. ‘S.W.’ Sorry I didn’t catch on earlier.” You nervously giggled and took Scott’s hand. “The show is starting soon. We should get to our seats.”

“W-Wait!” Scott exclaimed. You didn’t realize it earlier, but one of his arms were behind his back. He revealed that arm and in that hand, he was holding a bouquet of red roses, yellow tulips, purple bell flowers, and blue forget-me-nots.

You gasped and happily accepted the bouquet. “Thank you, Scott! This is so thoughtful. I’m sorry, but I didn’t get you anything.”

Scott shook his head. “There is no need to get me a gift. A lady should not worry about gift exchanging on her first date.”

You blushed and took Scott’s arm, him leading you towards the audience entrance, Ally cat-calling after you, which made you blush harder. Scott led you up a couple sets of stairs and into a private box with two seats, a clear view of the stage just beyond the railing. You took a seat, laying the bouquet delicately on the ground next to your seat. Scott did not sit down, saying he was going to go get refreshments and snacks. After telling him what you wanted, Scott let and you saw the house lights dim, the stage lights growing brighter as the opening song of Hamilton began to play.

The actor you recognized as Leslie Odom Jr., who was playing Aaron Burr, stepped into view and began singing the opening lyrics of the song.

How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a Scotsman…

~~~

It was about an hour into the musical when Act One was done, closing with the song Non-Stop and followed with the start of the fifteen-minute intermission. You had consumed about half of the box of M&Ms and about a quarter of your Coke when you excused yourself to the restroom. You finished your business and was walking out of the restroom when you spotted Ally running up to you with an excited look on her face.

“So, how’s it going?” She asked in a sing-song voice.

You rolled your eyes. “It’s been nice.”

Ally raised an eyebrow. “Details?”

You shook your head. “Well, he held my hand and he’s been a gentleman. He bought be snacks and a soda, he’s said I look gorgeous about a hundred times, and we’ve had a small talk here and there.”

Ally groaned. “Boring.” She said, trailing out the ‘o’. “Has he asked you to go to second base yet?”

“Ally!” You playfully shoved your friend. “It’s the first date. I won’t that far until at least the third or fourth.”

Ally murmured a whatever before walking back into the audience. You started following her when you felt someone tap on your shoulder. You turned around and saw Renee (who played Angelica) and Phillipa standing there, still in costume, smiling like Ally was just moments ago.

“Renee!” You exclaimed in surprise. “Pippa! What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be-“

“Your dad wanted to know how your date is going.” Renee cut you off, winking when she said ‘dad’.

You rolled your eyes. “It’s going fine. Scott’s a gentleman and he hasn’t tried anything with me.”

Yet,” Phillipa said, nudging you in the arm.

You blushed and lightly pushed the women away. “Away with you! I have a date to get back to and you two have a musical to sing in.”

“Keep us updated!” Renee called as she and Phillipa disappeared behind an ‘Employees Only‘ labeled door.

~~~

Act Two made you cry.

You were in the bathroom during the whole curtain call and some time after cleaning up and reapplying your makeup, damning Lin’s name for making you ruin your perfect makeup job. You could hear Scott and Ally coaxing for you to come out. You had insisted on staying in the restroom since you felt embarrassed for crying like a baby in front of Scott. He assured you that he was crying too but you didn’t buy it.

You were about to lock yourself in one of the stalls when you heard a very familiar voice.

“(Y/N),” You heard Lin’s voice, stern and serious. “Please come out of the restroom, I need to speak with you and your date.”

You gulped and walked out of the restroom, waiting to see an angry Lin with his arms crossed against his chest. But instead, you saw Lin, still in costume, smiling with what you thought was pride and relief. Scott stood close by, his eyes and face red like he was crying. Ally was leaning against the wall, holding her shoes in her hand.

“So,” Lin looked at Scott with a smirk. “This is your email Shakespeare? He’s not ugly, I’ll give him that.”

Scott was shaking and looked flustered. “I-I enjoyed your musical very much, M-Mr. Miranda.” He extended his hand, which Lin took and shook briskly before letting go.

Ally was fanning herself and you rolled your eyes before grabbing Ally by the arm and taking a step closer to Lin.

“Lin, this is my best friend in the whole world, Allyssa Kelsey.” You introduced your confused and dazed friend to your ‘caretaker’.

Lin chuckled and took Ally’s hand, kissing the back like he would if he was Alexander Hamilton. “Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Kelsey.” He said in a low voice.

Ally would have melted into a puddle if you weren’t holding onto her. She sighed dreamily, murmuring what sounded like ‘the pleasure is all mine’. You laughed and shook her, snapping her out of her daze. Ally slipped her heels back on and look Lin dead in the eye, a serious and cold look in her blue orbs.

“If you dare lay an unkind finger on my dear (Y/N), I will personally make sure you can’t physically have any more children, okay?” She threatened, cracking her knuckles.

You almost laughed when you saw the flash of fear in Lin’s face as he took a step back and nodded. Ally then smiled and turned around, planting a kiss on your cheek before wishing you, Lin, and Scott a good night and leaving the theater.

“Hey,” Scott pulled on your arm. “Can I talk to you? Alone?”

You blushed and nodded, letting him pull you into the now empty audience. He stopped when you reached the stage and hopped on it, taking you by your waist and pulling you up onto the stage with him. Without your shoes, you were about five foot and five inches, your high heels adding about four extra inches to your short height. Scott was already six feet tall at seventeen, easily able to look over and even overpower you. So whatever he had planned on this stage was making your stomach churn. Scott lead you to the center stage and stopped, his back facing you.

“(Y/N),” you heard him murmur. “I know we haven’t known each other for long but,” He turned around to face you. “I think you may be the love of my life.”

You blinked in surprise. “I’m sorry, what?”

Scott chuckled, running a hand through his fluffy ginger hair. “You’re making this harder for me to say.”

“Well, what are you trying to say, Scott?” You asked.

The ginger boy took a deep breath and took your hand.

“(Y/N) (L/N), You are amazing. You are beautiful, smart, funny, selfless, creative, independent, articulating, and a wonderful human being. You have gone through hell and back, showing that you had struggled with the devil and won. You have shown me kindness that no one else had in a long time. By just existing and being around me, you have made me a better person. You are my shining star, my goddess, my queen, my angel and I can’t let you get away.”

Scott kneeled, taking out a velvet ring box, smiling up at you and opened the box, revealing a gold ring with a large diamond in the center, surrounded by smaller diamonds. It looked expensive but it was probably a fake ring he bought online.

“Will you, (Y/N) (L/N), marry me?” Scott asked.

You froze, your eyes widening in surprise and shock. Marriage? You were sixteen. You never had a boyfriend before! Why was he asking you to marry him? Was he that desperate or did he truly think you and him were soulmates? You can’t marry him. You barely know him. Maybe if you knew him a little longer and were of legal age, but not now. Not after one date.

“I-I….” You took a deep breath. “N-No, Scott.”

Scott blinked and nervously chuckled. “I-I don’t believe I heard you clearly, my love. Please, speak louder.”

You pulled your hand away from Scott, taking a step backward. “I said no, Scott. I’m not going to marry you. We barely know each other. Besides, I just turned sixteen and you are my first date ever. I’m not going to marry someone I barely know. We can date, sure. But not marriage.”

Scott stood, staring blankly at you, closing the ring box and shoving it back into his pocket. You saw tears slowly fill Scott’s eyes and his face turned red. He sniffed and his face slowly scrunched up as he tried to hold back the tears.

“Scott?” You reached out to touch him but he ran past you, hopping off the stage and running for the exit. He stopped at the door and turned back, a determine but cold glare on his face.

“I’m not letting you go, (Y/N)!” Scott yelled. “I’ll make you fall in love with me and we’ll live happily ever after. You are mine!” And with that, he ran out of the theater, leaving you alone on the stage, staring at the door, confused as all hell.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [6/14]

Tuesday (Three Days Later) ~

“(Y/N)~”

You groaned as you rolled over on your other side, pulling the sheets over your head. You heard Lin chuckle and then the sheets were thrown off of you, revealing your pajamas (which was Lin’s ‘Mr. Write’ shirt, gray basketball shorts, and Mickey Mouse socks) and your bandaged limbs. Your hair was a mess, fluffy and tangled and sprayed all over the pillows. You were curled up in the fetal position and was sleeping comfortably until Lin woke up at seven o’clock in the goddamn morning and decided to wake you up too.

You screeched like a pterodactyl and grabbed for the sheets and Lin grabbed your arms and dragged you off the trundle bed, your body laying on the soft carpet floor. You heard Lin murmur a swear in Spanish before picking you up bridal style and carrying you into the kitchen, sitting you on a stool at the counter. Your laptop was sitting open, ready to be used and with the charger plugged into the wall outlet. Lin ruffled your hair, making it messier, before opening the fridge in search of breakfast.

You yawned and stretched, turning on your laptop and typing in your password. You opened your email to find a new email from an address you haven’t seen in a while. You opened it and found a good size poem typed in a cursive font

Hear my soul speak.
The very instant that I saw you did
My heart fly to your service, there resides
To make me slave to it, and for your sake
Am I this patient log-man.

You draw me, you hard-hearted adamant;
But yet you draw not iron, for my heart
Is true as steel: leave you your power to draw,
And I shall have no power to follow you.

I’ll follow thee and make a heaven of hell,
To die upon the hand I love so well
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

~ S.W

You couldn’t help but smile when you read the sonnet. You recognized what Shakespeare play each verse came from and fell in love with the email more. You’ve been getting these emails since the school year started last September. You thought maybe it was chain mail or one of your friends, but they all denied it being them. Your closest friends, Ally, Grace, and Burmese, started teasing you about the sender being a secret admirer and you actually started believing them a month after you started receiving the poems in email form and in writing, stuffed into the vents of your locker. You really wanted to know who your admirer was so you could have a face to put with the poetry. His initials were S.W. so you had to think about what boys with those initials would most likely be the poet that made you feel special.

You sighed dreamily, looking longingly at the email. Lin looked up from the bowl of half-mixed pancake mix and raised an eyebrow in confusion when he saw how you were looking at the laptop screen. He walked around the counter and stood behind you, reading the email and laughing. You snapped out of your trance, and shoved him away, glaring at him for reading your admirer’s personal email to you.

“It seems you have yourself an admirer,” Lin said teasingly. You stuck your tongue out at him before saving the email to the ‘Admirer’s Emails’ folder on the application.

“It’s none of your business, Lin.” You muttered.

Lin laughed, grinning innocently at you. “(Y/N), you’re staying with a thirty-five-year-old man who wrote girls he liked shitty poems in high school. I know how goes; boy sends you poems and cute notes, you find out he’s ugly and super geeky, and you reject him faster than a sale gets cleared during Black Friday.”

You laughed and shook your head. “I’d date a guy if he’s ugly.”

“You say that now. Wait until you see his face. Then you’re gonna do a full three-sixty and walk away.”

You rolled your eyes and was about to click out of the email when you saw another email pop up. It was from your secret admirer’s email. The subject said ‘Date at Hamilton Primary?‘ You clicked the email open and saw there was a two-paragraph note for you, along with a file labeled ‘Hamilton Ticket.pdf‘ You read the note aloud to yourself, Lin listening as he made you and himself coffee.

“‘Dear (Y/N),

I can’t seem to get you out of my head. I see you roam the halls with confidence and grace no queen or goddess could compare to. Your hair is always done to perfection and your eyes always sparkle and shine with life and passion. You are my sunshine, my gem, my queen, my goddess. I would love to take you out to the opening to Hamilton if I am allowed to. I know how much you love musicals so I thought this would be a perfect first date for us.

The 8:00 pm showing of the musical will be when our date will be. I purchased a private box close to the stage so we could have the best viewing of the musical. I’ll buy you whatever snacks and drinks you want. I just wished we were able to get backstage passes but they weren’t available. I hope to see you there! Wear something red, black, and/or white! I’ll be waiting in the lobby wearing a suit with a red bowtie, holding a bouquet of red roses, yellow tulips, bell flowers, and forget-me-nots. See you soon!

~ S.W.‘”

You blushed at the email, smiling brightly and your heart pounding. You looked up at Lin, who was smirking at you, one eyebrow cocked. You clicked on the file and bookmarked it to the browser. You hopped off the stool and proceeded to run out of the kitchen, squealing like a crazed fangirl who just touched her favorite actor’s hand. Lin followed you from the kitchen and into the bedroom, chuckling at how excited you were to go on this date.

“Have you ever been on a date before?” Lin asked as you were rummaging through your clothes.

You looked up at him and shook your head. “No, but it’s going to be so romantic.” You sighed dreamily.

“Maybe he’s going to sweep me off my feet and we’ll have a whirlwind romance and marry after high school.”

Lin laughed, making you glare at him. “What?” You asked.

“You’re helpless, (Y/N).” Lin simply states.

You frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re falling in love with this secret emailer and you don’t even know what he looks like!”

You scoffed and shook your head. “I’m just excited to go on my first date.”

Lin rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Do you have a dress for the premiere? You can’t go to opening night in jeans.”

You froze. You had gone through all three drawers that held your clothes and didn’t find any dresses, nylon stockings, or anything considered formal. You only had today and tomorrow to find out just what dress you were wearing, along with shoes and accessories. There were some dress shops in the city, but which one should you go to? You stood, grabbing a sweater and jeans, rushing into the bathroom and coming back out ten minutes later. You braided your hair as you grabbed your wallet and phone. You slipped on your sneakers and passed by Lin while you walked out of the bedroom.

“Where are you going?” Lin called after you, following you out and stopping you when you were reaching for the door.

“I need to go dress shopping.” You said. “I have money and my phone. I’ll be back before noon.”

“You’re not going anywhere without me, (Y/N),” Lin said, crossing his arms over his chest. “And you’re not leaving without eating breakfast. We’ll leave afterward, okay?”

You groaned and walked into the kitchen, mumbling a ‘whatever, Lin.’ under her breath but loud enough for Lin to hear. Lin chuckled to himself before following you into the kitchen.

~~~

9:34 AM (2 hours later) ~

The train was pretty crowded that morning, but you still managed to get your own seat without having to sit on Lin’s lap again. The ride was short, you and Lin getting off on the first stop and walking out of the subway. You lead Lin down the street to a dress shop you saw when you got out of the subway. You looked around for about twenty minutes and couldn’t find anything you liked.

The second shop was ten minutes away and you saw a few dresses you liked, but none in your size. You ended up buying some simple black stilettos and ruby earrings before moving onto the third store, where you only bought a set of gold bangle bracelets and some red and black makeup.

You had been out for about an hour when you reached the fourth store. You had stopped by a café and gotten something to eat before moving on in your search. You were growing more and more deflated, not finding a dress you liked. You had decided that if you couldn’t find a dress, you aren’t going on that date. You pushed open the shop door with the attitude of defeat but it quickly dissolved when you saw all the racks or dresses, all organized by color and shade of said color. There were mannequins here and there and you could see what looked to be fitting rooms all the way in the back.

You beamed up at Lin, who just looked at you with an expectant look, motioning for you to go one and look through the dresses. You strolled-almost-skipped down the aisle to the red dresses. You were scanning through for a red dress with black accents. You picked out a few dresses that fit the criteria and then strolled into a fitting room.

You slipped on the first dress. It was strapless and stopped a little above your knees. The top was black and the bodice and skirt was candy-red with black lace detailing covering the section where the red and black met. It was cute and comfortable, hugging your body perfectly.

“Come on out and let me see.” Lin called out from beyond the fitting room door.

You slowly opened the door and stepped out. Lin saw you and instantly covered his mouth with his hand. You nervously smiled and did a little twirl, letting the slightly puffy skirt sway around you. You looked back to Lin who’s eyes were glassy and watery. You giggled and cocked an eyebrow.

“You’re not gonna cry, are you?” You asked.

Lin shook his head and wiped his eyes. “Men don’t cry.” He said, his voice breaking, making him clear his throat.

You laughed. “Do you like my dress?” Lin nodded, smiling. “You look pretty, (Y/N). I just wished the skirt wasn’t so puffy.”

You frowned but nodded in agreement. “It looks so puffy and big, doesn’t it? I looks like I’m trying to wear a skirt made out of red tissue paper.”

Lin chuckled and nodded. “Well, Go try on the other dresses.”

You nodded and turned on your heels, walking back into the fitting room, closing the door behind you. You stripped off the dress and placed it to the side. You then picked up the second dress and slipped it on, admiring it in the full-length mirror.

The second dress was strapless and short just like the first one. It was ruby-red with black sequin detailing on the top and around the waist. The skirt has a thin black see-through over layer. You twirled, loving how the dress swayed and flew. You then left the fitting room for Lin to see the next dress.

“How about this one?” You asked, twirling around.

Lin tapped his chin. He was staring mainly at your torso. You were waiting for his response, waiting for him to say you were fat or the dress made you look like a cow, like your dad would say.

“That color doesn’t go with your skin tone.” Lin stated.

You blinked and stared blankly at him. “I’m sorry, what?” You asked confused.

“That shade. I don’t like how it clashes with your skin. Maybe try something darker?” He turned around toward the aisle. “I’ll look for some dark red dresses. You go put on that last dress you have.”

You nodded before re-entering the fitting room. After the door closed, you took off the dress and placed it with the first dress. You picked up the last dress. You really liked all three but you didn’t want to go on your first date looking like a tomato. Maybe you should try a regular black or white dress? With a sigh of frustration, you slipped on the third and last dress you had with you and stepped out.

“Well?” You asked, getting Lin’s attention instantly. He looked at you and froze, his jaw going slack and his eyebrows raising.

The third dress was, once again, strapless and short. It had a black top with black floral detailing around the bodice just like the first dress, but the skirt was dark wine-red instead of candy-red. This dress’ skirt wasn’t puffy like the first dress and it wasn’t so glittery like the second dress. It was simple but formal and pretty nonetheless.

“That’s the one.” Lin said.

You raised your eyebrows and looked at Lin with surprised. “Really? I thought you were-“

“Nope.” Lin cut you off, snapping his fingers and pointing at the dress. “That is the dress. We’re getting it.”

You rolled your eyes and smiled. “Fine.”

You returned to the fitting room and changed out of the dress and back into your normal clothes, holding the dresses in your hands. You returned the dresses to their rightful places on the rack, keeping the third dress as your final selection. Lin paid for the dress while you were looking at jewelry and you two left the shop, going straight for the subway to go back home.

After the trip home, you had a bounce in your step, literally skipping all the way to Lin’s apartment, making him laugh hysterically. You kept the dress hung on a hanger in the bedroom, your new heels and accessories being stored close by. You were so elated and couldn’t stop smiling. You were going to go on your first date at a musical premiere! Talk about romantic! And with a charmer how’s been flattering you for months, too. Maybe he’s going to be as handsome as you imagine? Will he be ginger? Or will he be blonde? Is he short? Is he tall? Your mind was racing with possibilities.

“(Y/N)!” Lin’s voice called from the kitchen. “I’m ordering pizza! What do you want?”

You sighed dreamily as you waltzed out of the bedroom and into the kitchen where the musical genius was. He watched with amusement as you twirled around the room humming a tune Lin recognized as ‘Helpless’. Lin laughed at you and you ignored him, not letting him ruin your good mood. This is what you needed. After the hell you just escaped from, you now had room and time for the whirlwind romance you always dreamed of. Your life was getting better. You were so excited. Nothing could destroy your happiness and excitement.

But, this was only the eye of the storm.

Stay Alive for Me (Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader) [5/14]

“You can set up your laptop on the kitchen counter or the coffee table,” Lin said, setting your suitcase and violin case next to the couch. “I have a trundle bed in my room you can sleep on too.”

You grunted in response. You set your laptop case on the kitchen counter and joined Lin in the living room, plopping down on the couch, Lin sitting down next to you. You managed to grab all your clothes, your laptop, your violin, and the jar of money under your bed. You had been slowly stealing money from your dad, saving it up for enough money to buy the bus tickets you needed to get to Albany. In the jar were about five hundred dollars and sixty-four cents. But, now that your dad was locked away in custody, you didn’t really need the money. You can just save it for a rainy day.

“How are you feeling, (Y/N)?” Lin asked, laying the back of his hand on your forehead. “Your fever is going down faster than I thought. Good thing, too. It should be gone before next Saturday.”

You felt a warmth fill your chest and your heart started beating quickly in excitement. Next Saturday, you were going to be watching the premiere of Hamilton from the stage wing instead of the audience. Lin couldn’t get you a ticket but he managed to pull a few strings and now, you were going to hang out with the cast and ensemble as you watch the show.

“I’m really excited.” You said, grinning brightly, making Lin chuckle and crack a smile. “I’ve never seen a musical live before. It’s going to be awesome!”

“The cast is really nice too,” Lin commented. “I’m sure they’ll love you.”

“I hope so.” You said, sitting back into the couch cushions. “My social anxiety is going to be the death of me.”

Lin chuckled, patting your head. He sat back to, mimicking you and staring up at the ceiling. “We have a few hours left of daylight. Want to go anywhere?”

You closed your eyes and thought. You had three months until you had to move out of your birth city and go live with your mom. You could go shopping now that you had freedom from your devilish father. You could go to those Recreational Centers in the city with indoor pools and weekend classes for hobbies you always wanted to try out. Maybe you could take up volleyball again at school. The new semester starts in a few weeks so you could practice more so you could get on the team again. You could volunteer at shops and organizations by donating your time and help out. The options were endless.

“Let’s go to that paint shop on 21st Street.” You said, opening your eyes.

“A paint shop?” Lin asked, raising an eyebrow. “Why?”

You sat up. “I want to get back into art. I was an art kid when I was younger. Mainly painting and acting. I was a pretty good painter, according to my art teachers.”

Lin smiled and stood up. “You like to act?”

You nodded and grabbed your wallet (which was really one of Lin’s old one but he said you could have it). “I love to act. I was usually cast as leading roles or other major roles.”

“Is there a certain type of drama you like to act in?” Lin asked, grabbing his phone and wallet before slipping on his shoes.

You pulled on your NYCU sweatshirt and tied up the laces of your converse. “I love tragedies. But not as much as I love musicals. I only got to be in one musical and I was an ensemble member, which sucked.”

“You dance?” Lin looked at you, cocking an eyebrow.

You shrugged. “It was a class grade to be in the musical so, kinda? It was mandatory.”

Lin nodded and grabbed his jacket. “Let’s get going.The subway is most likely packed at this time of day because of people getting off work.”

You followed Lin out of the apartment and down the hall to the elevator. Lin pressed a button and the doors closed. The elevator was quiet and you were fiddling with a loose piece of the bandages that covered your left forearm.

When you collected your stuff from your house, you had to go to the police department to fill out forms and get your ‘wounds’ checked out. All the cuts that haven’t healed yet were disinfected and wrapped up in bandages. In the end, both arms and both legs were wrapped up, from wrist to shoulder and from ankle to mid-thigh. Your father was filed into the system and you got to leave with Lin, the female officer giving you two a ride back to Lin’s apartment building. You took some more medicine for your fever and ate something more solid now that your stomach wasn’t a mess. You took a nap too since you felt emotionally exhausted.

Lin lead you out the building and down the street. He stopped ten minutes later and lead you down the subway entrance. After Lin bought the single ride tickets for the both of you, you went and sat down on a bench, waiting for the train. You watched all the people bustling in and out of the station, talking on their phones or listening to loud and horrible pop music. Most of the people were dressed in business attire and carrying briefcases while everybody else around them was dressed in graphic tees and ripped jeans. There were a couple families here and there but not many. It was about five o’clock so it was time for people and students to go home from work and school.

The train pulled up to the platform and you stood, following Lin and the crowd into the passenger car. The seats filled up almost instantly and Lin managed to get a seat next to the doors, but the seat next to him was taken by a young woman in a hijab. You took hold of the railing next to Lin’s seat as the train lurched forward. You wobbled and shook but kept a secure grip on the rail and your feet were planted on the floor. You took out your phone and opened Twitter, mindlessly scrolling and liking your favorite celebrities’ tweets.

“Do you want to trade places, (Y/N)?” Lin asked out of the blue.

You put your phone away and looked at him. You smiled and shook your head. “That’s okay, Lin. I’m fine.”

Lin raised an eyebrow. “Kid, you’re wobbling and look to be on the verge of falling. Are you sure you don’t want to sit down?”

You nodded and the conversation ceased. The conversation was dropped, but not Lin’s determination to get you to sit down.

You felt Lin’s hand wrap around your wrist and before you could react, he pulled you off your feet and towards him. You stumbled and squeaked before you stopped. You shut your eyes, waiting for the feeling of the dirty metal of the train floor but it didn’t come. You slowly opened your eyes and your face turned fifty shades of red. You realized your situation and your mind had shut down.

You were sitting on Lin’s lap.

His arms were secured around your waist, holding you at a small distance but close enough to pull you away if something happened. You were sitting sideways so your legs somewhat dangled over his because of you being shorter than him. Your feet kicked back and forth, the heel of your shoes grazing Lin’s jeans softly. You crossed your arms and glared at Lin half-heartedly, making him laugh and smile like he did nothing wrong.

The woman in the hijab noticed this and she giggled. “Your sister is very pretty, sir.” She said to Lin.

Lin looked at her and chuckled, shaking his head. “She’s not my sister, miss.” He answered with a soft smile.

The woman’s eyes widened slightly and she let out an embarrassed giggle. “I’m sorry. I assumed.”

Lin shook his head again. “No worries. Small mistakes are part of everyday life.”

The woman smiled softly. “What I mean to say was that your daughter was very pretty.”

Lin’s eyes widened in surprise and you had to hold back a laugh. He went to correct the woman but the trained stopped at the first stop and she got off, allowing you to move to the seat next to Lin. You started laughing as Lin glared lazily at you, crossing his arms and pouting like a child.

“I don’t look that old,” Lin muttered softly.

You shook your head. “Well, you pulled me onto your lap. It was either I was your kid or you were a pedophile. You’re lucky she called you my dad instead of the other option.”

Lin rolled his eyes and stared at you with a ‘you’re-killing-me-here’ look. The kind of look a father would give his kid if they were messing around with him. You never saw that loving but playfully annoyed look in your real father’s eyes. There was only hatred and evil in his eyes. You never wanted to see those eyes again.

“I don’t mind it, though, being honest with you,” Lin said.

“Don’t mind what?” You asked, your face hold a confused frown.

“People assuming I’m your dad. You’re a cool kid. I see a lot of younger me in you.” He softly smiled. “I don’t mind you seeing me as a father figure.”

“Lin, I literally met you this morning.” You rolled your eyes and chuckled. “I’d like to know you as a person before seeing you as a father figure.”

Lin chuckled, sitting back in his seat as the train came to a stop at the next stop. “You’re right.”